Do It Now, Remember It Later
by Azzanna
Summary: "And then what, Lily? What difference it would make? You don't like me, I'm an arsehole with no care of others or the world around me. I'm arrogant and selfish, and everything you could possibly hate in man. You want someone stable like Remus, or that Ravenclaw bloke. Someone who will talk you about philosophy and bring you red roses. I'm not that guy, Lily!" (Jily, side Wolfstar)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **Tadaa! A new marauder story! I started this a month ago, and I had a serious intention to start publishing about two weeks ago, but I suddenly had much more school work than I had planed and I had to push this a while. But, now here I am, with a brand new story of Marauders' seventh year! The main paring in this one is James/Lily but this has a side paring, Sirius/Remus. Peter is not a lone wolf, but his partner isn't anything major.

This is going to be a multi-chapter fiction, and I have right now about six and half chapters written, though not fully ready. The story is going to have about 25 to 30 chapters and I try my best to publish one every Sunday. This can go on for a while at least, and maybe you'll get extra publishing when I have my summer holiday.

The rating M is mostly just to be safe in future. **WARNINGS (the whole story, not just this chapter): Character death, violence, war, swearing, possible suggestions adult themes, possible drugs usage, alcohol and smoking presented in lighter way than they should.**

But without further explanations, I almost proudly present you, the first chapter of Do It Now, Remember It Later!

* * *

**_CHAPTER I: Hogwarts Express_**

It wasn't new for James to run through the thick brick wall between the platforms nine and ten. Still, after the seven years he had run through it, he somehow feared that the wall wouldn't let him through and he'd crash against it and make a scene. So, as he was running towards the wall, he closed his eyes and hoped the best.

And like always, he didn't crash against it, but got through with ease like every time. He stood in there for a moment, looking at the red shield. _Platform 9 3/4. _It was going to be his last year in Hogwarts and he was sad about it, even before it started. _How sensible of me_, he thought. _This is usually Remus' job._

He moved from the wall as the first person bumped on his back. He apologized the cranky old man, who immediately started whining the traditional youth-these-days speech every person older than 30 seemed to have mastered. James, who had heard this talk more than enough times to quote the exact words this old man was going to say, apologized again, a bit louder this time, and left the old man to speak alone.

The platform wasn't all that crowded yet, the clock being about quarter to 11 with the train leaving at 11 o'clock. James had always found it fun that most of people didn't come before they were in huge hurry and almost had to run to the train so it wouldn't leave without them. Yet, he knew that two of his friends, Sirius and Peter had that habit. Even now that Sirius lived with him and had come to the station with the same ride, he had somehow been able lose himself to that cafe to flirt with the waitress. He had told James that he would "catch him later" and that he should go on and find them a place to sit. Like James didn't know he was trying to take advance on the poor girl.

As he had been ordered by Sirius, he got to the train and tried find the best compartment, close enough to the doors, so they'd have easy exit when they arrived, but far enough so they wouldn't be interrupted every five minutes by someone looking for a place to sit. His obvious choice was the first compartment in the start of the train. It was a place people rarely came, and gave them nice privacy. Plus, the witch with tea trolley would stop on them first.

James was pleased to find their usual compartment empty, and took the seat. He could hear that the platform was becoming more crowded in minutes and smirked to himself as he heard people shouting, trying to reach to each other's ears over the sound of the crowd. He opened the window and poked his head out of it to take the look at the full platform.

"Potter!" he heard from his right. "Are you eavesdropping us?"

The question was asked by non-other, than the lovely Lily Evans, the girl with flowing red hair and piercing green eyes. Lily had took hating on him on the first time they met at the Hogwarts Express in their first year, but it hadn't bothered him until the fourth year, when he had started to fancy her. When, in the fifth year, he had tried, in worst possible way may be added, to ask her out and been ruthlessly turned down, he had slowly backed away but Lily hadn't left him alone and liked to display her hate whenever possible. In the sixth year, James had decided to hell with it, and started answering her insults with cheeky smile and a comment that usually left her blushing.

"Lily, my flower, how lovely to see you again after a long summer," he started, putting up his most charming smile. "I see you've gotten even more snarky." Lily rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest, which made James grin wider.

"But to answer your question, no, I was not eavesdropping, nor am I interested to. But, if you see Sirius, Remus or Peter, tell them I wait them at our normal compartment, will you, darling?" Without waiting for a response, he pulled his head back inside. Yet, he kept his window open and in three seconds, he saw Lily standing in front of it.

"Yes?" he asked. "Did I forget something?"

"You're an arsehole, you know that?"

"Yes, I am aware of the fact," he laughed. "But, little miss Evans, you'll have to learn to deal with your strong disgust towards me this year."

"And why is that, oh mister bow-me-I'm-the-king-of-idiots?"

James pouted. "That wasn't really nice, Lily." Lily gave him a smirk and signed him to answer the question. "You think I'm telling you after that? Uh-uh, mi lady, you've lost your chance."

"Spit it out, Potter," Lily ordered, and even James was able to see that she was fighting her smile.

"Well, looking at your chest- no, not like that, don't hit me! - I see you have been chosen to be the Headgirl."

"What's it to you?"

"Well, just that I've been chosen to be the Headboy this year," he told her, giving her the most charming smile he could.

Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth couple of times before blurting out: "You're bullshitting me, aren't you?"

"That was my exact reaction and I eventually _wrote_ to Dumbledore to ask if he was on his right mind, and he answered that, yes, I am the Headboy, and no, he hadn't been on his right mind since God knows how when, but that's off the point." James said, carefully taking in Lily's reaction in case she was going to jinx him. "So, were kind of a partners this year, so try not to hex me every chance you get."

"I don't hex you that often!"

"Sorry, sorry, just saying!"

Lily stood outside the train and just looked thoughtfully at James' face. He didn't know what to do, so he just kept quiet and looked at his hands. They stayed like that for couple of minutes before James couldn't take it anymore.

"Okay, Evans, you're creeping me out, what are you thinking?"

Lily seemed to snap out of a trance, and focused her green eyes on James. "Oh, did I stare?" James nodded.

"You were looking like you were trying to choose which one of Hagrid's not-so-cute pets you were going to put after me." The comment, and James' honestly terrified face made Lily laugh, and just listening Lily's laugh made James feel bubbly and happy.

"I'm sorry, James. I promise I'm not putting Hagrid's pets after you," she said trough her laughter. James gave her a shy smile and opened his mouth to say something, anything to make him appear less lovesick, but the train pipe took that moment to whistle and Lily looked up to the clock hanging next to the platform sign.

"It's already five to 11. I better get going." And with that Lily left, leaving James to look after her in haze. Quite some while after, he shook his head and closed the window. His head was far over the clouds and even though he felt an idiot for being so madly in love with a girl who was just plain mean to him most of the time, he couldn't help himself. He couldn't help but find himself on this happy haze every time he was able to hold a decent conversation with her longer than five minutes.

Most of the time his interaction with Lily Evans was trough sarcastic remarks and glares and smirks, but today, first time in a long time, they had actually _talked_. It made him happier than anything that had happened through the whole summer with Sirius. She had called him James, too. _Lily Evans had called him James._

"Prongs!" Peter Pettigrew called out when he appeared to the door of the compartment. "How was your summer?"

Peter, his little rat friend, sat down on the seat opposite to James and waved his hand in front of his face. "Anyone home?" he asked, chancing the wave into snapping his fingers. "Earth to James, earth to James!"

"You know, Peter, I think this is going to be a great year to all of us," he said, trying to collect his thoughts, still smiling like a madman.

"How so? What happened before I got here, you act like you are in cloud nine or something," Peter asked, looking his friend suspiciously, trying to find some Chocolate Frogs from his back at the same time.

"Nothing. I just, feel it, Wormy, I just know this is going to be a great year," he said, not wanting to explain the thing with Lily. He knew what the other Marauders would think it about him and his stupid crush.

"It's Lily Evans, isn't it, Prongs?" Peter said, smiling knowingly. James' didn't have to answer, the blush on his cheeks told Peter more than enough. Smiling, he shook his head and put his attention to his pack and the Chocolate Frogs he was trying to find. "So, you have great feeling of this year, huh? Tell me, does this _'great feeling'_ include me getting laid?"

James laughed and caught the Chocolate Frog thrown at him.

Remus appeared to the door and looked at the two of his friends laughing. "Something I missed?" he asked as he took a step further to the compartment. "Fetch me one, Wormy."

Peter threw him a Frog and Remus caught it with ease. Even though nether Peter or Remus played Quidditch like James and Sirius, they had been given quite nice reflexes, or maybe it was just because the constant pranking they pulled off.

"You really have to start calling me something else. You're making it sound like I'm worm instead of a rat," Peter said. Remus gave him a sweet smile.

"Why, is there much difference between those two?" Peter stuck his tongue out like a five-year-old and Remus laughed at him.

"Did neither of you see Padfoot? I left him to the cafe hit that one waitress but he hasn't made an appearance since then," James asked, being a bit worried if Sirius would actually make it to the train, which was leaving in minute or two.

"He was at the platform when I got in, had some lady on his neck," Remus said, focusing on trying to open the Chocolate Frog. Once he got the plastic wrapper off, he opened the paper box enough to let a slide of light to wake he frog before closing it again and opening it properly after he felt the frog to take its only jump. James had to admit that it was a wise way of opening the Frog, making sure it didn't get away, but unlike Remus, he always threw the frog in his mouth as quick as possible to feel it jump there.

"Some lady, huh? I could have sworn that waitress was a muggle..."

"She was," said Sirius Black from behind the window. "Open this thing and let me in."

"You can't use a door?" Remus asked, while Peter opened the window.

"There's no time for such thing, Moony, this train is leaving in seconds."

Just in that moment the pipe whistled and the train started to move. Sirius reached out his hands for others to grab. James and Peter immediately took a hold of Sirius' hands and started pulling him from the window. Somehow they were able to pull Sirius to the train without further difficulties, but once he was inside, he got a lecture from Remus for being late, to which Sirius answered he was not late, he was just exact. Needless to say, Remus wasn't all that happy with the response. Peter and James tried to keep straight face every time Remus looked at them, but at the some point, they just gave up a started snorting every time Sirius came up with a comeback.

"So," James said after Remus had stopped with the lecture. "The waitress was muggle?"

"Yeah, she was nice and all, but not really my type," said Sirius while trying to catch Remus' eyes. "Unlike my lovely little Moony-Moony!" he continued and attacked him with his arms wide open. "Please, please, _please_, don't be mad at me!"

"Shut up, Black, I _am_ mad at you."

"Anyway! Remus said you had some lady on your neck in the platform? Who was that?" James tried again, but Sirius idly ignored him in sake to make up with Remus.

"Remus, please, don't be mean."

"You're an arsehole and you should be ashamed of yourself."

"Moony..."

"You're a horrible person, Sirius Black."

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry."

"What was that, I didn't quite hear you?"

The door of the compartment opened at that second and all four of them turned their attention to there. Lily Evans was standing there, already dressed up in her school uniform, lacking the cloak, as it was still fairly warm in begin of the autumn.

"Potter, we have a duty. Are you coming?" she asked, coldly, but James could see from the spark in her eye that it was all an act.

"On your service, miss," he said and got up from his seat. Lily took a look at his clothes, and gave him a frown. James looked his clothes, too, which were just ordinary muggle clothes he and Sirius bought from muggle London this summer, but maybe it was the ripped jeans that were too much for Lily.

"Do I need to chance these?" he asked. "I mean, do the prefects really care what I'm wearing?"

Lily seemed to think for a moment before she simply shook her head and gestured James to get going.

"Well, we'll see later, boys. I'll do my 'duty' now," he said, smirking to Peter's horrified face.

"You leave me alone with these two? James, no!" he said and James laughed.

"Sorry, mate. There's nothing I can do. Besides, Moony follows us in a moment," he said, winking at Peter. Peter fought his grin and showed James his middle finger in answer.

The way to the prefects' compartment, which was in the middle of the train, was pretty quiet between the Headpair. James was mostly trying to keep his cool and act like a gentleman his mother had tried to raise him to be, and at some point, he noticed that he had to pay alarmingly much attention on his breathing.

"So," Lily started, focusing on the corridor front of them. "How was your summer?"

"It was... nice, I guess. Nothing special," he answered bluntly. Lily turned her face towards him so he would see her rolling her eyes. "Don't roll your eyes to me, Miss Evans, it's not very polite."

"Then give me a proper answer, Potter," Lily said. "Did you see those 'Marauders' of yours?"

"Well, Sirius lives with me, so I really couldn't escape him. Remus visited couple of times and Peter was in France with his parents. So, kinda."

"Black _lives _with you? I do pity your summer lovers."

"Lily, dear, that's the reason I don't do summer lovers."

Lily pumped his shoulder. "Don't lie to me, I know."

"You know my summer lovers? Do tell me, because I don't," James laughed and ruffled his hair. He caught himself in mid ruffle and pulled his hand down. He knew Lily hated when he did that.

"Are you really telling me you didn't have anyone at summer? That you spent your summer completely alone with Black and Remus without _a single_ lady?" Lily asked, giving James the look she probably thought would make him spit out the names of every single woman he had ever been with. James answered the gaze with straight face.

"I did not have anyone at summer. Not even Sirius and Remus. They locked themselves to Sirius' room most of the time and left me alone," he made a sad face, but Lily didn't look convinced but let it there as she was fairly sure that even if James had someone, he would refuse to tell her. Which she found strange as she had always thought James as kiss-and-tell-type.

They arrived to the prefects' compartment door and gave the new fifth year prefects quick instructions of what were their jobs here in train and what they would be at the castle. Lily was the one to do most of the speaking, James mostly just standing there and listening. After they had sent the new prefects to their jobs, came the old prefects to listen their patrol times. Remus gave James a wink when he arrived and James just rolled his eyes and smiled. Remus patrol started right at the moment and his partner, now that Lily had become the Headgirl, was a sixth year Ravenclaw, whose pair had been moved to Durmstrang last year.

After the compartment had emptied, James waved his hand to Lily and told her they'd see each other in the castle "or earlier if you come to visit out compartment" and ran off before Lily could hit him with a hex. He could hear Lily yelling that he was an arrogant idiot, but only answered with a laugh and continued on his way to the begin of the train.

On his way he met the witch with the trolley and asked if the other had bought it empty. The witch, who had taken liking on the boys in the first compartment, laughed and told that she had to refill the trolley after they had bought all they wanted. James gave the lady a smile and half-jokingly kissed her hand when he wished her a nice day.

When he arrived the compartment, it was full of candy wrappers, and in the middle of those, Sirius and Peter were shooting each other with Jelly Slugs.

"Really now, guys? Do I have to take house points for such a behaviour?"

Peter and Sirius laughed and moved to shoot James with the Slugs. James dodged, and the Slug hit Remus, who had just came back from his patrolling. Peter, whose Slug it had been, watched carefully as Remus took the slimy sweet from his face and moved his gaze to Peter. Sirius and James grinned at the look in Remus' eyes and told Peter to run for his life.

* * *

**A/N 2:**So, this was the first chapter! I hope you enjoyed, and if you noticed any mistakes, I'd wish you'd kindly inform me. I tried my best, but I'm not native, nor fluent English speaker. Follow, Favourite and/or Review if you enjoyed! (:

Updated: 29/6/2014


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **Hello! So, it's Sunday and time for the chapter 2! I honestly almost forgot to publish this, as I had so much to do today, but here it is.

Anyway, here, hope you enjoy!

**WARNINGS on this** **chapter: **mildly foul language, sexual innuendos

* * *

**_# CHAPTER II: "Game Rules"_**

There wasn't much more for them do to that day. When they arrived to the Hogsmeade's station they were taken to the castle by the horseless carriages. The Welcoming Fest went like always. Dumbledore reminded that Forbidden Forest didn't have _forbidden_ in its name just for fun, and then read Flich's List of Things That Are Not Allowed, which included half of the Marauders' trunk's quiddity. After that prefects were told to take care that the first years got to the dorms safely.

Marauders took a freedom to gather to the Kitchens and take a bit Butterbeer and some sweets with them back to the common room for their own little Welcoming Fest. The way to the seventh floor was fairly easy for them, even without the Map or invisibility cloak as the first evening was never as well patrolled. In their third year, Sirius had insisted that it was because the teachers went to Hogsmeade to get drunk and had a huge orgy afterwards and, to be honest, if anyone asked his guess now, he would say the same thing.

The common room was full. The new first year students were sitting in the corner closest to the portrait hole, and when the Marauders slammed it open, they all jumped a bit and shrunk closer to the wall.

Sirius walked to the middle of the room, and as the older students knew what was about to come, they moved further from the chess table they knew Sirius would climb on. James followed Sirius and together they stood to the little table to keep their annual new-year-new-tricks speech. They had started to this tradition in their fifth year, when they had officially "made it" as Marauders, the pranksters of Hogwarts.

"Hello, my dear fellow Lions, how was your summer?" Sirius asked and got a vague mumbling as an answer. "Oh, c'mon, are you even trying? Anyway, hello to the little ones in the corner, yeah, you there, hi! I'm the great Sirius Black, and this is my _very deer _friend James Potter, who-"

"Now, now, _Snuffles_, let me tell by myself. Like said, I'm James Potter, the Headboy, -yes, McKinnon, _the Headboy_- and the Quidditch Captain this year. Like every year, the trials start in the second week and I wish to see at least the last year's team there. Also-"

"_Also_, thank you, Prongs, for stealing the attention from the brightest star in the room, the new blood is very welcome to the team, and the fact that you were in team last year, does not mean you're in this year. The rule applies on me, too, _thank you very much_, Evans. And if you were not aware, the first Hogsmeade weekend is in two weeks, all above third year are allowed to come. If you didn't get your permission signed, just bring it to the old man Padfoot and we'll see what we can do. Moony! That _hurt_, you know."

"As you may know, this is the last year for us Marauders to be here in Hogwarts, and we have many special... _gifts _planned out for you."

"But, as always, we won't reveal our great plans. You'll get to know them once you realize you're in middle of them. We wanted to inform all of you in advance just so we could watch our _wonderful_ Headgirl Lily Evans to pull off her hair in despair and stress as she _tries_ to stop us. Yes, Lily flower, we love you, too."

"Now, I and Snuffles wish everyone a great year, and there, in that corner, is our lovely little house mouse Peter, who has Butterbeers for everyone. Welcome to Gryffindor!"

The common room clapped their hands, mostly because of the free Butterbeers, and as a huge flow of red and cold, they moved towards Peter, who threw bottles to everyone close enough. Sirius and James moved down from the table and got to the couch in front of the fire place.

"The _'deer friend' _joke is getting kinda old by now, Padfoot, you should come up with something new," James told Sirius, who was trying to wave Peter to throw some Butterbeers for them too. Sirius gave him an innocent smile.

"You know what they say, old dog doesn't do new tricks."

"You're hopeless."

"You love me."

James rolled his eyes and took the Butterbeer Sirius had been able to get Peter to throw to them. The evening was mostly calm, (if you don't count the part when Sirius decided it would be fun to make Alice soon-to-be-Longbottom's Butterbeer to explode on her face), and when the clock hit 10, the common room was empty.

Much like in the common room, the evening in the Marauders dorm was calm. After they had gotten to upstairs, Sirius had pulled a bottle of Fire Whiskey out of his trunk and told the boys that it was time to have their own little welcome party. After the first bottle had been emptied, mostly by Sirius himself, they, or mostly Remus, had decided to call it a night and go to sleep. They were given a long weekend to enjoy themselves, and they decided to enjoy it by perfecting the last pieces of Marauder's map and stealing food from Kitchens.

The next Monday was disastrous. The boys were running around the dorm, trying to find their books and socks. Sirius had lost his tie and James couldn't find his Headboy pin. Peter had lost his Defence Against the Dark Arts book. The only one, who seemed to have everything under control was Remus, who ended up borrowing Sirius one of his extra ties and finding Peter's book. James' pin was found under his pillow but once he got it attached to his chest, they noticed that there were only thirty minutes of the breakfast left.

Once they arrived the Great Hall, the owls had left and their post had been left to the empty seats in middle of the table. McGonagall was giving the schedules to her students and giving quick advice to those, who she thought were in need of one. When she stopped in front of Marauders, she gave Peter's uniform and James' hair a judging glance.

"If I was you, Potter, I would try a comb," she said before passing them their schedules and continuing on her way.

"I saw that coming," James said, eyeing the schedule. He had DADA in the first lesson and then a free period. After the lunch they had Potions.

"You did? What was your O.W.L in Divination again?" Sirius asked. "Troll, am I correct?"

"It's a phrase, Mr Outstanding. Seriously, how high do you have to be to get an O out of Divination?"

Sirius looked death serious in the eyes. "Helga Hufflepuff."'

Peter snorted in his Pumpkin Juice and Remus, who had heard that particular joke at least ten times, hit his head to the table. After the joy of looking through their schedules and realizing that Remus was the only one to have classes after lunch on Thursdays, they had to move towards the Defence Against the Dark Arts class, which they all had together.

The first lesson of the year was always the most interesting one, as it was annual thing that the teacher changed. Last year's the professor had disappeared mysteriously during the holidays and they knew was had been hired in quite a hurry. It was expected that the new professor would be from Ministry. After the last year, when Sirius' cousin, Bellatrix Black had casted Imperio to another student in middle of the Halloween celebrations, Ministry had insisted that they should have right to place Aurors to Hogwarts to keep events such as this from happening. Dumbledore had told the Minister of Magic that Auror forces in Hogwarts would make the students feel uncomfortable and that the Ministry should rethink their decision. So, after a long discussion, Ministry had told that they would have an Auror teaching the Defence Against the Dark Arts.

During their way to the class, they made a small bet of what kind of teacher they would have this year. Peter put two galleons on short and fair young male with grey eyes, Sirius put his money on an old fat lady in a green dress and James' bet was that it would be a young woman with brown eyes and short hair.

"It's a middle aged, about 6"3 feet tall black man, who's wearing a dark blue cloak. He has a scar on his chin and his eyes are blue," said Remus, just as they were about to arrive the class.

"A giant black man with blue eyes? Sure, Moony, whatever you say," Peter laughed along with the other two but Remus gave them a smirk and opened the door to them, gesturing for them to go before him.

As they stepped inside, they were greeted by a man. A huge, over six feet tall, dark skinned man, who was wearing a dark blue, almost black cloak. The man had a big scar on his chin. It started from bit to left from his chin and continued until it met his right ear. But the most notable thing in him was his bright blue eyes.

In awe the other Marauders started to pick their pockets to find the galleons to Remus, who held his hand out, grinning wide to his defeated friends.

"Okay Remus, how?" asked Peter as he handed Remus the money.

"Not 'till I have my money," Remus said smirking widely. "From all of you," he noted to Sirius and James. Once he had all the galleons collected, he opened his mouth.

"Obviously, unlike you three, I keep my eyes open in the opening ceremony," he said, gave the others a sweetest smile possible before and walked off to their places in the front of the class.

"That's cheating, Remus!" Sirius yelled.

"What is cheating, Mr Black?" the new professor asked him in a deep voice. Sirius rose his gaze to the teacher's face.

"We had a bet of what you would look like and he already knew!" Sirius said, pouting like a child who had dropped his ice cream.

"It's not Mr Lupin's fault he is smarter than you, Mr Black. Now, go to your seats," the Professor answered and moved towards the front of the class. James and Peter swallowed their snorts, while Sirius focused on giving death glares to everyone, who dared to look at him.

By the end of the class, they had learned that the new Professor was called Gilbert Thomas and that he was an Auror and had been sent to Hogwarts to teach now that he was unable to continue in his work due an accident he refused to explain further.

After the lesson, the others took their way to their next lessons while James sweetly told them to have great time in their classes, while he would have a free period.

James took his way to the common room. Now, as a responsible seventh year student, he was planning on doing the essay they got from Defence about the things they learnt last year.

But, his good intentions were flushed off when Lily stopped him on the way.

"Potter, McGonagall want to see us, something about the Headstudent duties."

"She wants to see us now? Don't you have Care of Magical Creatures?" James asked surprised. He had been fairly sure he was the only one, who hadn't continued it. Lily blushed.

"I... I failed the OWLs," she said, looking at the walls. James would probably have forgotten himself looking at the pink tint on her cheeks, but he was far too surprised to pay attention to it.

"You _failed_?"

"I'm not an animal person, okay?" Lily snapped, looking James angrily.

"Sorry, I just... thought I would have noticed you having a free period on same time," James said, ruffling his hair without further realization about it.

"I avoided you."

"_Oh._"

They stood awhile in the corridor, looking at the floor, both a bit embarrassed. James' brain was empty, he had nothing to say which was uncommon. He knew Lily wasn't all that fond of him but he didn't know it was this major. She had spent _an entire year_ avoiding him while he had been completely obvious to it.

Lily seemed ashamed of her words, but didn't know how to apologize him. After so long of being just plain mean and angry to James Potter, she wasn't sure how to handle him nicely.

"So, should we get going, then? McGonagall isn't going to be happy about it if we come late," James said, trying to act normal, like it didn't hurt him at all.

"James, I-" Lily started but James cut in, harsher that he had meant.

"I know you hate me, Lily."

"No, I-"

"Let's just go, shall we?"

Neither of them spoke a word after that. For the whole way James walked couple steps ahead, not taking a single glance of Lily, who walked behind him with her head hanging, feeling bad for what she said.

She didn't see James Potter as the dreamboat everyone else in her year seemed to think he was, though she was aware, why people had come to such conclusion. She knew that he was a childish and dangerously full of himself, and that he did things that were highly questionable, but she could see that he wasn't a bad person. He had his mistakes and faults, but so did every one. Lily had ones, he couldn't ask James to be perfect, no matter how much he thought he was.

So, now that they had to be the Headpair together, she was hoping she would have an excuse to get to know him better.

They arrived the McGonagall's office quiet. James knocked the door, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Lily, on his side, looked him confused, but just as the door opened, James opened his eyes and his face was again the mask of confidence and cheeky smiled it always was.

"G'morning, my dear professor," he said, sounding just like every other time. He did not appear to be sulking anymore, but something told Lily the mask would fall of his face as soon as they'd leave the office.

McGonagall gave James a warning glare and told the two of them to come inside.

"This is about the Headstudent business, as I told Miss Evans on breakfast. Please, sit down," she said and pointed the two wooden chairs on the other side of her desk.

"How's the Quidditch going to be this year, Potter?" McGonagall asked James, who gave her a dazzling smile.

"Way to go about 'the Headstudent business', professor. But yeah, if the old team has still hold on what I taught them last year, then I only have to find a new seeker and beater," James told her. She seemed visibly pleased to hear that they might have a grasp of the Quidditch Cup.

"Mr Lupin still refuses to pair up with Black and become a beater, I assume?"

James nodded and seemed quite sad about it. "He says he rather stays in audience. And that he's not in a shape to play games."

McGonagall nodded, too. "He and Black would be quite a beater pair."

For the rest of the meeting McGonagall explained them their duties. They were to patrol in the corridors from 9 to 11 and they were allowed to give other students and prefects' detention and take house points, if they saw the school rules to be broken in any way. She also gave them a fair warning that no fighting would be allowed between the pair and during the patrol, they had to walk _together_ in case there would be an emergency. After she had made sure they understood their job and the responsibility it held, she let them go.

Lily walked to the door and stopped to wait James, who was still talking to McGonagall about his job as the Quidditch Captain. She noticed that he wasn't leaving anytime soon so she just turned on her heels and left the two of them to discuss the tactics and how they sure wished Alice would try for seeker this year.

Lily made her way to the Great Hall to spend the rest of her free period there. Only the seventh year students without electives could have been there and since it was still quarter till the lunch started, the Hall was empty.

Lily seated herself to the table and put her head to her hands. She was still feeling guilty about blurting out the avoiding issue earlier. She didn't hate him and she didn't want him to think like that. She used to hate him, sure, since the first day she had seen him in the train. She remembered how James and Sirius made fun of Severus trough the years and how she had always tried her best to stand up to them for Severus. Severus, who had called her a mudblood for that.

On that day too, Marauders had been picking up on Severus. As Lily had stepped in and told them let him be, Severus had called her mudblood. On that day James had stood up _for her_. She hadn't thanked him, she had called him names and told that he made her sick. Which had been true. She had been so sad and angry and James had been the person that had made Severus say such thing, or so Lily thought that time. Now, as she watched the way Severus grew up and the way he became more and more attached to the Dark Arts, she was fairly sure that it would have happened at some point, even without James Potter and his big mouth.

Last year, she had taken all of her anger and frustration out on James. Every time she was feeling down or angry or stressed, she would find him and take it out on him. She kept pointing out every mistake he made and hoped one day she would hit one of his insecurities. Shortly after Christmas, James started answering her with a smile and a cheeky comment or a compliment and Lily was just defenceless. Her harsh words became more of sarcastic remarks that actual insults and sometimes she would just say them to see James giving her that cheeky grin and tell her that she had done her hair nicely today or that her freckles made her nose look very cute.

She honestly couldn't see why James put so much effort on making her like him more. Nor could she see why James started to answer her insults with those compliments. To her, James Potter was a complete mystery.

And she was most certainly not sure how she was going to deal with him now.

She sat there, completely lost in her thoughts and didn't see James arriving the Great Hall. James walked to Lily and sit in front of her.

"Lily," he said, snapping Lily's attention to him. "I think we need to make... game rules now that we're the Headpair together." Lily seemed confused.

"Game rules? This isn't Quidditch, Potter," she said, not understanding where James was going with this. James gave her a faint smile.

"Well, we're going to work together from now on and we probably should know things about each other. And know what is okay and what is not, just so I- we won't make each other uncomfortable with anything we do."

Lily was about to open her mouth to tell James that he didn't make her uncomfortable, which was obviously why he was trying to get these "rules" sorted out between them, but closed her mouth in second thought.

"Okay, then. You start", she said instead, crossing her arms on the table.

"Me?" James asked, not having expected that Lily would ask him. "I- You don't make me uncomfortable."

"Okay, I'll start then. First, I want you to stop that," she said. James stopped with his hand in his hair. "I want you to speak to me like you would speak to any of your friends. You don't have to be afraid of me or afraid that you'll make me uncomfortable. I'm a big girl, I can handle you and your bullshit. Secondly, I expect to you to tell me, if something's bothering you. If I do something that makes _you _uncomfortable, say it. I won't be insulted, and I won't hate you for it. And I don't hate you otherwise ether, seriously, don't assume I feel something and let me speak up my mind and explain myself, when I feel like it's needed. And thirdly," she took a deep breath and James looked at her expectantly. "I want you to dye Sirius' hair green."

James snorted, thinking all the screaming Sirius would do if he one morning woke up with green hair. "Green? I think pink would suit him better," he said, giving Lily a wide smile. Lily smiled back at him, before putting up serious face.

"It's your turn." James opened his mouth to repeat his statement before, but Lily gave him a steely stare. "Potter, don't tell me there's nothing, because I know that's a lie. Tell me, now."

"Well, you could stop calling me Potter for first," he said, sounding shyer than was intended.

"And?" Lily questioned him.

"And call me James, for example?"

"Okay, _James,_" she said, putting weight on the name, "Anything else?"

"Try be more of an animal person," James said cryptically smirking to her.

"What? Why?" she asked. Did Potter have a pet? Was he an animal activist? Was he a vegan?

"Because I'm quite an animal in bed," he winked, trying to keep straight face as he watched Lily's face to turn bright red.

"_Oh my God, Potter!_" she yelled, reaching from the other side of the table to hit him to the back of his head. His loud laughter filled the Great Hall as it started to fill with the hungry students.

* * *

**A/N2: **I hope you liked, if so, favourite or follow or send me a review, and if you did not, please, tell me why, it would be interesting to know! Again, the same request as the last time, if you spot mistakes, please inform me, I'm not a native English speaker and I would like to improve myself.

Till the next time, bye! (:

Updated: 29/6/2014


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: **AAHH, I'm so sorry this is a day late! I graduated on Saturday and I had a bit of a party with mu friends and yeah, I just couldn't publish this yesterday. SORRY!

But, here is the third chapter, I hope you like it, though I'm not all that happy with this. Tell me about my mistakes, if you will, and I'll do my best to correct them.

Thank you very much!

* * *

**_# CHAPTER III: The doe_**

The first week rolled by peacefully. James and Lily had become "somehow, not quite, friends" and had been able to go through the whole week without any fights. No matter how happy the Marauders were for James finally getting closer to Lily, they could have done with a little less of his constant love talk.

The Quidditch trials got closer and James had to spend more time in the Quidditch pitch preparing stuff and making sure there were brooms to spare in case someone had forgotten or broken their broom.

On Wednesday, a day before the trials, he was on his knees in front of the Potions class, begging for Alice to come to the trial tomorrow.

"Please, please, _please_, Alice! You're the best seeker man could ask for, _please,_ come to the trials tomorrow!"

Alice held her laughter and looked James challengingly. "What would I gain from that?"

"My eternal love, acceptance and the soul of my first born," James said, hearing the Marauders' snorts behind him. "Anything, Alice, I'll give you anything, just attend the trials and I'll be your loyal slave for the rest of our lives."

"That suspiciously like you'd proposing me, James," she said to him, her mouth breaking to a smile.

"I will propose you if that's what it takes to get you to my team, seriously," James told her, looking straight to her eyes. If she didn't know him better than that, she might would have actually believed he was serious.

"Okay, Potter, I will come to the trials," she started but was interrupted by James jumping up from the floor and yelling at his success, bumping his fists to the air in joy. "_If,_" she started a bit louder this time to make sure James heard her over his little victory celebrations. "If, and only if, you're Lily's pair from now on."

James stopped in middle of his little dance and gave Alice a confused look. "Yeah, okay, but why?" he asked, not seeing Alice's logic behind this one.

"I'd rather be Frank's pair now that he's in our class and I don't want to hurt Lily's feelings," she said, but James still didn't quite understand the reason but decided to work on his part of the bargain without questioning it. "Oh and don't let her know that I asked you to ask her. Make up some excuse for it."

James rolled his eyes. "You're lucky that I really want you to my team."

She smiled him sweetly and turned around as she heard her name to be called. Frank had come to the end of the corridor and waved her. Frank was year older Hufflepuff who had stayed behind to retake his Potions because he had failed the N.E.W.T's and wanted to be an auror. As soon as he caught them he scooped Alice to a long kiss. Peter made fake gags at them and when they broke apart, Sirius and Remus jumped on each other's necks.

"Oh Frank, you're so strong!" Remus said, making his voice more high pitched to mimic Alice.

"Alice, baby," Sirius said and then they acted like they were fiercely making out, while Peter and James were practically choking on their laughter. Frank blushed brightly, but Alice just rolled her eyes. She was used to Marauders acting like this.

"Oh, sod off, you two," she said.

Lily, who had eaten the lunch with Marlene and Mary who nether had Potions, came to the group of the other Gryffindors.

"So, did Remus and Black finally find each other?" she asked, looking at them "making out". Sirius broke their fake kiss and opened his mouth.

"Oh Moony, you're the bright light of my night sky, you shine like... the moon?" Remus snorted.

"Spare the world and leave the poetry who those who can, Padfoot," he said, taking a step behind, breaking away of their previous hug-like position.

At that moment, Slughorn appeared and let them to the classroom. They dragged to the class and to their places. Lily was about to sit next to Alice just as James remembered his little task.

"Lily flower!" he said loud enough for Lily to hear and look at him. "Could you be my pair from now? It was dumb luck that I even got here and I need someone who actually knows what they're doing and maybe you could help me? Be my pair this year?" He gave Lily the sweetest smile he could manage and hoped that she would be okay with it. He did not only have his seeker in game but his grade, he really wasn't all that good in Potions.

Lily opened her mouth to say yes, but closed it to look at Alice. She didn't want her to feel like she would chance her to some guy. Alice just smiled at her and gave her a nod.

"I can be Frank's pair. Help that poor man, he just sucks."

James gave Alice a glare but was grateful that she actually seemed to help herself to become to the Quidditch trials. Lily nodded to both of them and went to sit next to James, who danced his little victory dance in his head. Now, he got a seeker and a great grade on this class in his pocket.

Slughorn's usual, long monologue about the importance of the right kind of stirring started and in the end of the first hour they started project of making the Polyjuice Potion. They made the potion in the class and after the every class they would have to write two paragraphs of how the potion was getting on. After that part of his instructions, Slughorn had a pause so everyone could groan their frustration in peace before he continued by giving them the schedule of the working progress and sending them off to the work.

The lesson went by peacefully. James and Sirius didn't have time to prank any Slytherins and neither did any of the Slytherins have time to bother them. Potions were one of the only classes that all the four houses were on together as not so many got into the N.E.W.T course. As the matter of fact, with six Ravenclaws present in class, Ravenclaw was the biggest house in the lesson.

By the time they got out of the class, they were all supposed to take a walk to their common rooms, but the three Marauders present had other plans.

"Kitchens," said Remus, looking at their infamous map and in the cue, they separated themselves form the rest of the group and took their direction to the kitchens.

From the kitchens they found Peter, who was laying on top of one of the house tables, sipping a Butterbeer and humming the muggle song he had heard on his trip in France.

"Wormtail, old friend, drinking that much Butterbeer in 24 hours can't be good for you," Sirius said as he sat next to the laying Peter, who just gave him a grin and took a sip of his drink.

"I've been wondering," he started as James and Remus got closer, a tray of all kind of small bakeries in James' hands. "If I laid here when 'till the dinner time, would I be transported to the Great Hall along with the food?"

James and Sirius snorted loudly before breaking into roaring laughter while Remus was much more clam with his amusement. For a awhile, Peter looked offended as the other were laughing at him, but watching James and Sirius practically rolling on the floor with their laughter, he couldn't help but laugh, too.

"You think about the strangest thinks, Wormy, seriously," James said, whipping of the tears of laughter from his eyes once they had calmed down. "You're hilarious." Peter smiled at him and offered him a Butterbeer.

The next day was a hell for everyone. James was freaking out about the trials and in hideously bad mood for the whole day. He would snap at people for seemingly no reason if he was asked something and most of the time he just plain ignored others and kept on babbling about the trials and Quidditch and how he would train them all death the year. For the luck of every one, James, along with many other people, hadn't continued the Divination to the N.E.W.T level after the morning lessons disappeared to the Quidditch pitch to make sure everything was ready.

Once the trial started half an hour after the classes ended, James was already standing in front of the goal posts and telling people which chancing room they should go.

While those trying to the team were chancing into flying clothes, the stands were being filled by the people coming to see who would make it to the team this year. Though most of them were Gryffindors, there were couple Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws and the whole Slytherin team to see what kind of team would Gryffindor have this year.

"Okay, everyone!" James yelled at the attendants. "Those trying for Chasers, make a line on the first row, those for Beaters on second, Seeker on third and Keepers on fourth, _go!"_

The demand was followed by a moment of chaos before the lines were formed in the ordered order.

"We start by trying out the chasers three on time and keepers two on time. Make groups now, and try to warm up a bit. After the chasers and keepers, we will have beaters and after that seekers, so keep warm and keep sharp in case here's a Quaffle falling to your head," James said before opening the box containing the balls. He took out the Quaffle but kept the others still in the box. "Is the first group of Chasers ready? Keepers?" After an agreeing answer, he took his broom and told the chasers to follow him and the keepers to go to the goal posts.

In the audience, Remus and Peter were sitting next to Frank, who had come to watch the trials to root for Alice. Alice was at the moment sitting in the bench at the pitch with Sirius.

"I still don't understand how James got Alice into that," said Lily from couple rows behind them. "I mean, she was so against it couple days ago."

Mary MacDonald rolled her eyes. "I don't know if you have noticed, but he gives fairly convincing puppy eyes."

"Much experience with those, have we, Mary?" Peter asked the girls. Mary blushed, and gave smirking Peter a middle finger.

"_Okay, START!" _they heard James yelling in the field and the try-out started. The first group was just horrible and they could practically _see_ James sighing 20 feet away. The second group was not all that much better, but the third group, which was formed out of last year's players and couple older students who had almost made it to the year,was much more convincing.

In the end, James took in the last years Chasers, Marlene and Daniel, back to his team and chanced the last years keeper to a fifth year student, Annmarie, who had taken everyone off guard as she had never attended the trials before.

The Beaters were much easier choice. James made them fly a bit first and then tried their aim by telling them to hit the ball to somewhere he pointed. The beaters of his choice were Sirius and a third year boy, whose aim wasn't the best, but with the strength of his hits, it was enough if the ball went even close.

As it was the time for the seekers, Frank in the audience was like on hot rocks. He couldn't keep in place and at some point, Peter asked Remus if they should just petrify him.

But, as expected, Alice was the one chosen to be the seeker. James was beaming in the field, looking at his team.

"I'm glad I get to play all of you this year. I hope to see you all next Monday at the practice after the last class. You don't have to bring your broom or anything else. We will go through our schedules to come up with practice times that are best for everyone. If any of the old or the new members of our team have something to ask, come to me, or Sirius and we'll help you the best we can," James said and told them to get going.

That night in the patrol with Lily, James couldn't stop talking about the new Quidditch team. Lily was smiling and listening as James enthusiastically told her everything about the team and Quidditch in general.

"Sorry, you must be bored listening all this, I'll shut up," he said after they had patrolled about an hour.

"No, no, keep going," Lily told him. "You sound so happy when you talk about Quidditch."

James blushed and muttered something Lily wasn't quite able to hear. She was just about to ask for what it was before James opened his mouth again.

"So, uh, Potions are your strong point, huh?" he asked, trying to get Lily mote involved in the conversation so it wouldn't turn into his monologue again. Lily smiled knowingly, but no matter how obvious the chance of the subject had been, she still answered.

"Yeah, though I like the Charms and DADA, too," she said. "Even though I got only Exceed Expectations on DADA. The ministry officer was a toerag. I heard only five Ravenclaws got O out of it." To Lily's confusion, James smirked. "Why the smirk?"

"Oh, no reason," he said, smirking wider and wider.

"Spit it out, Potter," Lily demanded. "Or do I have to find Veritaserum?"

James laughed. "No, no, it's just that I got O in DADA." He gave Lily a wide grin. She watched him in awe.

"What did you do? Sleep with her?" she asked, not believing that James had gotten better than her. "You didn't even study!"

"I casted a Patronus, that's how," he said, winking at her. Lily looked angrier in second.

"No one told me you could get extra credit of that!" she yelled frustrated. James laughed.

"You're telling me you could have casted a Partonus? Who taught you?" he asked.

"What do you meant _who taught me?_ I read about it in library and then practiced until I could produce a spirit guardian and-"

"Wait, you mean you can do _a corporeal _Partonus?" James asked. It was his turn to watch Lily in awe.

"Yeah," Lily said smelling the challenge that was about to come.

"I don't believe you," James said, crossing his arms across his chest. "I don't believe." Lily smirked and pulled her wand out. She murmured the spell under her breath and from the tip of her wand came a sliver animal that run to the end of the hallway before disappearing into a sliver dust. Lily turned to James, smiling smugly, but James wasn't watching her. He started to the place where the Patronus had disappeared.

"It-... It's a deer," he whispered, still not turning his head, not putting any attention to Lily.

"To be specific, it's a doe," she said proudly, though a bit astonished by James reaction.

"A doe," James repeated.

Lily watched James for a long time. He seemed to be completely dumbfounded.

"Okay, Potter, what's up? Why are you making that face?" she asked, and finally James turned his gaze to her.

"My-" he started before he caught himself. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening them again. "I can't tell you, Lily," he said in calm and controlled, which was very unlike him. "If this was just about me, I would, but this isn't. I can't tell you, I'm sorry."

Lily wanted to argue with him that now that they were kind of friends, he should tell her, but something made her not to want argue with him this time. Maybe it was the fact that after all this time she had spent thinking it was a selfish and arrogant bastard who cared about no one and nothing but himself, he had showed her that he would not betray other people for her. Or for anyone.

So, she just nodded and they continued for the rest of their patrol quiet, both in lost in their own thoughts. Once the clock hit 11, they went back to the common room.

"So... See you tomorrow then," James smiled at her.

"Yeah..." Lily answered. James waved his hand and started making his way to the boy's dorms.

"James," Lily suddenly said. James turned back to her, and she blushed. "Can you someday tell me what was all that about?"

James gave her a slight smile. "Maybe," he answered before the moved upstairs to the Marauders dorm, leaving Lily alone to the common room.

James arrived to the dorm, closed the door and leaned against it. He slid to the floor and put his head between his knees. The other Marauders peaked from their beds.

"What's up, Prongs?" Sirius asked, in somewhat joking, somewhat concerned voice. "Did she curse you face?"

"A doe," James' muffled voice asked. The Marauders looked each other confused.

"A doe?" asked Peter. "What the hell is up, Pro-, no, wait, _Prongs_, you haven't fallen in love with an animal, have you?"

"She casted a Partonus," James said, like he haven't even heard Peter's comment.

"So, you can cast one, too, James, what's the big deal?" Sirius asked.

"It's corporeal."

"She can cast a corporeal Partonus," repeated Remus. "Okay, that's kinda big deal. But I still don't-" he stopped suddenly, his mouth hanging open. "A doe?"

"A doe."

Sirius and Peter looked each other confused for a while, before the pieces clicked together in their heads.

"Evans' Patronus is a doe? Doesn't that make you like, soul mates or something?" Peter asked before Sirius could say anything to it.

James answered with a vague mumble and fell in his side.

"Okay, collect yourself, man," Sirius said. "Why do you act like it's the end of the world? Aren't you happy?"

"I can't tell her," he answered, finally showing his face to the others. "I can't tell her I'm an animagus with a form of a stag, I can't tell her, and if I now learn corporal Patronus and it's a stag, I just seem like a creep."

The other Marauders seemed to finally understand the problem. Remus looked down.

"I'm sorry, James," he said.

James quickly rose from the floor and got to Remus' bed. "No, no, _no!_ It isn't your fault, of course not!" he said, putting his arm over his friends shoulders. "Don't you fucking blame yourself about this."

"But, if it wasn't for me, you could tell Lily!" he said, feeling like he was once again in the way of his friends happiness.

"Would he even know he was a stag without you? No, he would not," Sirius said, getting up from his bed, sitting to Remus next to his. Peter also got up from his and walked up to Remus.

"Yeah, we're friends and all. Bros before hoes?"

"That's very sexist, Wormtail," Remus pointed out, already in better mood.

"Bros before does then?" James suggested grinning.

Remus snorted and eventually, all four of them ended up laughing.

* * *

Updated: 29/6/2014


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: ** I feel like I should never had promised you guys anything of what day I'm going to publish an new chapter because I'm again almost late with this. But yeah, here it is, I probably will be bit more on time next week, or at least I'll try my best.

Any mistakes, please, tell me so I can correct them and improve my writting. (:

Enjoy!

* * *

**_# CHAPTER IV: Failed attempt_**

James kept walking in his own happy haze in the day after the trials. Even though he couldn't tell Lily about the stag and doe thing, but just knowing it by himself made him feel happy all over.

In the morning, they had Transfiguration, and then they had a free period all together as none of them had chosen to continue History of Magic. In Transfiguration, they practiced chancing their appearance. They worked on pairs and they had to make themselves to look like their pair. James and Sirius were pairs and to them, it was fairly easy job as they were same height and had same colour hair. The only problematic thing was that Sirius was much more slender than James, who was much more muscular.

To Remus and Peter, the job was much more difficult. Not only were they not as talented in transfigurations as James and Sirius, who were particularly on the top of the class, they had much less in common. Peter was almost 5 inches shorter than Remus and while Remus was very skinny, Peter was a little overweight.

"We couldn't mix pairs, could we?" Remus, looking almost like Peter but with wrong nose and too big stomach, said with a bored voice, looking at Sirius, who already was a complete copy of James.

"That wouldn't be any fun, Moony," Sirius winked at Remus.

"Well, that looked weird," Remus and James commented on the same time. It was very unlike James to be winking to any of his friends. To be honest, they had never seen him to wink to anyone else that Lily. With James, of course, never seen himself winking to anyone.

"Gosh, Moony, why are you so damn tall?" Peter asked, trying to make himself taller. "And so skinny! You should eat more, mate."

Remus rolled his eyes. It wasn't a secret between the Marauders that he couldn't eat all that much after the full moons. The only thing that he seemed to be capable to keep inside was chocolate.

"Oh, _oh shit_, sorry, Remus," Peter said. Remus waved his hand, signalling that it was all fine.

"Now, a little attention please," McGonagall told them. "We try the gender exchange spell next. How about the Headpair came here for a show to the class."

Lily and James slowly moved from their places to the front of the class as McGonagall asked. Once they arrived, James gave Lily a grin and thought Lily rolled her eyes for him, she smiled back.

"Now, Potter, I saw you perform this spell on one of the other students last year," McGonagall started, and James gave her an apologizing smile. "I want you to chance your gender and then, make yourself as close to Miss Evans' appearance as you can."

"Do I transform my clothes, professor?" He asked innocently, not looking at the blushing Lily next to him.

"If you want to stand in front of the class in a skirt, Potter, do as you please," McGonagall answered, trying to keep a straight face.

James smirked and nodded. With a simple wand movement, he changed his gender and then started working on the other parts of himself. Once he was finished with his body, he changed his clothes and transformed "_the Headboy" _pin on his chest into a _"the Headgirl"_ one.

"I'm ready, professor" he said, pulling of his classes. The class broke into laughter, as even though he had changed his appearance into Lily, his voice was still the same old James. Lily watched James in awe.

"This is really weird," she said. James gave her a spin and the patted his eyes to her.

"How do I look?" he asked, making his voice more high pitched to appear more female like. Lily snorted and rolled her eyes.

"Very good, Potter, 10 point to Gryffindor, you can chance yourself back now," McGonagall told him and he did what he was told. "You can go to your seat now. As you noticed, even though you can chance your appearance exactly like someone's without Polyjouce Potion, the potion is much more in accurate. Right now, if Miss Evans would have some birthmark Mr Potter was not aware of, it would have spoiled his cover." McGonagall kept on telling them about the pros and cons about the Transfiguration and Polyjuice Potion until the class ended. Since it was one of the rare sunny days of September, the Marauders went outside.

"So, Hogsmeade this weekend, huh?" Sirius asked, laying himself down into the grass. "Does any of you have plans of that one or are we all together?"

"Actually," Peter spoke up, "I'm going with Helen. You know that Hufflepuff girl from our Herbology?"

"Oh," Remus said, "When did you ask her?" Peter gave him a bright smile.

"I didn't, she asked me!"

The other Marauders looked at Peter in awe. After a moment of silence, Peter seemed offended.

"You don't have to act so surprised that someone actually likes me..."

"No," Sirius quickly said, "It's not that, just, wow, Peter, the girls don't go around asking anyone, you know. Even I have to ask them by myself most of the time."

Remus rolled his eyes annoyed. "It's dangerous to be so full of yourself, Black." Sirius turned his gaze to Remus and they just stared each other's eyes for a while. Peter and James tried to keep on with the conversation.

"So, are you going to ask Lily, Prongs?" Peter asked.

"I don't think she would come with me even if I asked. I better just keep it down for a while, at least until we get to know each other," answered James, running both of his hands through his hair. He laid his back on the grass and looked at the cloudy sky.

"You've been in same house for seven years, don't you think you already know her?" Peter asked, laying down next to him, leaving Remus being the only one sitting,

"Yeah, but just, we know each other, but yet, we really don't. Do you get what I mean?" he asked Peter, who shook his head. James sighed. "Just, I know how she does in school, I know her mannerism, but there's so much I don't. I don't know her favourite colour, or if she likes her tea with sugar and cream and for sweet Merlin, I know _nothing _about her family."

"Okay, I get it, you want to know her _better_," Peter said, sounding seriously understanding and James turned his head to look at Peter. "But, couldn't you just get to know these things on a date? It wouldn't sound as awkward trying to ask her favourites and dislikes there, would it?" he said, turning to his side to look at James, "I mean, that's what dates are for."

"So, you think I should ask?" James said, looking as Peter nodded. His stare was sure and serious about this. James smiled and reached his hand to tap Peter on head.

"Thanks mate."

For the rest of their free time they spent analysing the latest game of the Quidditch World Cup. The final, Canada vs. Netherlands was next week, and while Peter was strongly rooting for Netherlands, James was on Canada's side. Usually, the two of them agreed with almost everything, but Quidditch was one of those things Peter just couldn't follow James' locig. He knew there was a strong chance James was right, he was oddly good in guessing the right scores, even though Sirius liked to pick on him about his Divination O.W.L score.

By the time of the lunch, they got up and moved back to the castle. Remus and Sirius didn't speak for the whole was in, nether when they arrived the Great Hall and sat down to wait for the food.

"Go, James, ask her now!" Peter said, nodding towards the doors where Lily just arrived. Next to her was a boy, wearing Ravenclaw's cloak, who James only remotely remembered, but knew was in the same year with them.

"Who's that?" he asked, not from anyone really, but Remus was the one to give him answer.

"He's Rubert, a Ravanclaw, I have no idea of his last name, though. It's something starting with C, I think."

"Corman?" Sirius tried. He was much more attention to his nails than Remus and the answer he gave him. James was sure, that if he would rise the knife from the table, even it wouldn't be able to cut through the tension between those two at the moment.

"Possibly," Remus said in a similar manner, looking straight at James, who sunk further back from his seat to avoid the deathly look in Remus' eyes that was not even meant for him.

James turned back to look at the boy talking to Lily. They had stopped by the Ravenclaw table, he was blushing and not directly looking at her. She was twisting her hair next to his right ear, a sign that told James she was uncomfortable. Still, she smiled to him and nodded. His gaze snapped right up to her, and he was beaming. James knew, what was going on. James knew _exactly_ what was going on, but still, when Lily neared the table, he couldn't help himself.

"Hello, Evans," he said in his most professional voice. Lily hid her smile and bowed to him a little.

"Potter, it's a pleasure."

"Sure it is," he said, giving Lily a one sided smirk that made Lily answer with one and roll her eyes.

"So, how was Rubert today?" he asked, trying his best to sound normal. Lily gave him a sceptical look.

"Are you two friends?" she asked, and James lost his words for a moment.

"No, not exactly. I just... saw to talking to him and decided to ask," he said, coming as close to the truth as he was comfortable. "Just, you know, if he was feeling down or something?"

Lily looked something between amused and irritated. "He asked me to Hogsmeade, if you're so interested," she said, crossing her arms to her chest. James heart sunk but he kept on the smile.

"I assume you said yes, then?" Lily nodded and the feeling in his chest got more intense. "Okay, well, have fun with him then."

Lily nodded but didn't move. "You had something else," she said, "Spit it out."

James cursed God or whatever the thing was that made Lily Evans so sharp with her eyes. He fight his facial muscles so the smile wound turn into a grimace.

"It's nothing, Lily, really," he said, trying to appear as honest as possible. Lily rose her eyebrow, and James saw that she hadn't been so unconvinced in her whole life. James' brain was on fire, trying to come up with an excuse.

"I was just wondering if you could have helped me with Arthimency tomorrow but I just settle with Moony as you have a date planed," he said along with a fake laughter that sounded bad even into his own ears.

Still it all seemed to satisfy Lily, who just shrugged her shoulders. "I guess Remus just has to do it, then." she said, before waving the boys goodbye and continuing to her friends.

"Well, that was painful to watch," Sirius said as soon as Lily was out of hearing distance. Remus gave him a glare.

"Wow, Padfoot, way to be a supportive friend!" he said, his voice dripping sarcasm and held anger.

"What _is _your problem today?" Sirius asked, turning his eyes to Remus. "What have I done?"

Remus didn't answer but turned his head so Sirius could only see his left cheek. James sighed and started eating his lunch, slowly, just to make sure he didn't have to watch the duo before him.

After the lunch, they had a lessons in Charms and one of Herbology. In Herbology, which they had with Hufflepuffs, Peter coldly left them with a playful wink and went to pair up with Helen, his date for tomorrow, leaving James to watch after him with a horrified stare.

"You can't leave me with these two!" he mouthed to Peter who was soundlessly laughing at his expression.

"For the one in train," Peter mouthed back, putting up an innocent smile that soon turned into a smirk when James gave him a middle finger.

James turned around to see if there was anyone free so he wouldn't have to team up with ether of the two grumpy pants behind him. He saw Frank without a pair and was about to run off to beg her to pair up with him when Sirius gripped the back of his cloak.

"You're my pair," he said. James watched as Remus walked up to Frank and asked if they could pair up. He saw Frank nod and turned to look at Sirius.

"You're an arsewipe." Sirius gave him a smirk.

"I know."

For the rest of the lesson, he was forced to listen Sirius' endless speech of how Remus acted like he was his father. He didn't need one, he had had enough of fathers for a life time, he told James, who kept rolling his eyes and muttering agreements when he felt they were needed. In Sirius' opinion, Remus had no right to moralize him as "it's not like he's my boyfriend or anything."

"But you want him to be, don't you?" James finally asked, trying to cut a flower of the plant that was doing its best to keep him away from it. Sirius didn't answer anything, but muttered something sounding like "It's complicated, you know", and James wasn't in a mood to have none of that.

"Padfoot, please, I'm your best friend. Do you think I haven't noticed? You live with me for god's sake!" James said, finally getting a grab of the flower and cutting it off. He turned around and put it into the cup Sirius was holding. "Just tell him, mate. He won't hate you for it, he might even be relieved. It's not like your feelings would be one-sided."

Sirius snapped his head up and looked James with hopeful eyes. "Really? Has he told you that he likes me?" he asked enthusiastically. James had a huge urge to hit his head against wall.

"Seriously, now! Why do you think he's been acting like that? He's fucking jealous," he said to Sirius who blushed and smiled.

"Thanks, Prongs," he said, patting James' shoulder and smiling as James rolled his eyes and ruffled Sirius' long, black hair.

"You'd be lost without me," he said. Sirius just laughed and nodded his head in agreement.

Once professor Sprout called the class dismissed, the tension between Remus and Sirius had gone to half even though they still didn't talk to each other. Sirius kept giving Remus glances, and as he most likely thought he was being sneaky, even the Hufflepuffs six feet's behind them could notice them, not even speaking Remus, who promptly kept ignoring him.

Before them, Lily was walking with the other Gryffindor girls. James could easily pick up that they were talking about Lily's date tomorrow.

"So, do you like him?" Mary asked obviously exited of Lily's date.

"I don't really know, Mary," Lily said. Mary seemed confused. "I just didn't want to turn him down. He would have been so disappointed and sad."

"Didn't bother you when Potter asked you out in fifth year," Marlene pointed out and Lily blushed.

"He was bullying a person in front of me! How could I ever had said 'yes' for that?" she said, defending herself. Marlene rolled her eyes.

"He seems quite nice thought," Alice said, sensing the tension. "Rubert, I mean. He's great bloke, I'm sure of that."

"Yeah, unlike Potter," Mary snickered. "Did I ever tell you about that one time when we were dating when he..." James let a sigh and turned to the boys.

"I'll take a walk, you go already."

Without waiting for a response he turned around and walked off, leaving the other three to watch after him, confused.

"Should we go after him?" Remus asked, mostly from himself, but again, Sirius gave him an answer.

"No, he's just a bit down of the Lily-thing. Just leave him to sort his thoughts."

Remus didn't offer Sirius a look, nor an answer, but eventually obeyed him and turned to continue the walk to the castle. Sirius sighed, but didn't speak up.

The Marauders made their way to the common room. During their way there, Peter kept babbling random things to avoid the awkward silence that would fall between the sulking duo. At some point, he gave up and informed the two that he would go to library to finish the assignment they had gotten from Charms. Sirius was glad to join him, but Remus remained in the common room, as it was calm enough in his opinion.

The dinner got closer and it with the time passing by, Lily came to talk to Remus.

"Have you seen James?" she asked. As Remus rose his left eyebrow and gave her a half smile, she blushed and felt need to explain. "It's the Headstudent business. We have to collect he permissions from third years for tomorrow."

Remus laughed. "You don't have to explain, Lily. I haven't seen him since the last lesson. He went 'for a walk', meaning his sulking somewhere."

Lily rolled he eyes. "Stupid Potter," she muttered before continuing louder. "Any ideas from where to look for him?"

"Kitchens, the Quidditch pitch, Hogsmeade are the most common. Though, you can cross over the Hogsmeade as he's going there tomorrow anyway," Remus told her. He opened his book and was ready to start reading again.

"How do I get to the kitchens?" Lily asked. She did not even wanting to know how James would have been able to get to the Hogsmeade in Friday night. It would have meant much more trouble for her, too much more trouble.

Remus told her the way to the kitchens and she went on her way. But, as there was no one in the kitchens, she took it as her clue to continue to the pitch.

The sun had started to settle in the horizon and the weather was getting colder. The settling sun coloured the sky red as Lily kept walking through the grass to reach her destination. She pulled he cloak tighter around her, feeling the cold rush from the Forbidden Forest.

Once she got to the pitch, she saw James sitting there in the stands, playing with the Snitch he had stolen when they were in fifth grade. He was leaning his elbows on his knees and catching the Snitch with lazy movements, seeing as its magic was already fading and it wasn't half as fast as it used to be. There was a half burnt cigarette between his lips.

"Why the sad face, James?" Lily asked as she walked closer. He jumped a bit in his seat and turned his gaze to Lily. He looked startled.

"Holy shit, Lily! Don't sneak up on me like that!" he said and she smirked.

"Couldn't resist the temptation." James glared her and she smirked. She walked up to him and sat next to him. They were quiet for a while and James put the Snitch to his cloak pocket.

"I didn't know you smoke," Lily said while pointedly looking at the cigarette between James' teeth. James shrugged.

"We don't know each other so well, you know," he answered.

"Well, we could start getting to know each other better by you answering the question before. Why the sad face, James?" she asked, stealing the cigarette and taking a breath of it. James looked at her in surprise and it was her turn to shrug her shoulders. "Answer me, Potter."

"I'm a pathetic idiot," he said with a smirk as a try to cover the fact that he really thought so.

"May I ask, how so?" Lily said, taking another breath of the cigarette before giving it back to James. James didn't answer and took the last breath of the ending smoke before dropping it to the ground and stepping on it. Lily watched him closely before a sly smirk appeared her face.

"I know that look. James 'Every Girls Dreamboat' Potter is having girl problems." James glared her and she laughed. "Don't be so sad, James. Do you want to talk about it?"

James shook his head. "Oh, c'mon, you don't have to tell me who it is," she said, "Just tell me the problem and I might be able to help you." James rolled his eyes.

"She just doesn't like me. In any way," he said. Lily looked suspicious.

"Are you sure?" James looked at her in amusement.

"She has made it perfectly clear that I'm an arrogant toerag, who should take his head out of his ass as it is not a hat."

"That doesn't necessarily mean she hates you," James looked doubtful. "I mean, remember fifth grade? That time after O.W.L's?"

James blushed brightly. "I should probably apologize for that..." Lily swatted the apologize away.

"I was rude, too, don't mind that. But that time, I had the biggest crush on you and still I acted like that," she laughed. James looked her with his eyes wide.

"Bloody hell, you got to be kidding me?" he said, running his hand through his hair. "You have to be kidding me, Lily!" Lily laughed harder and shook her head.

"I'm not kidding, it's true. You were just so cocky and no matter how hard I tried to deny it, I thought you looked adorable," she told him. James blushed and looked down but couldn't fight his smile. "But, during the time Severus was my best friend and, you know, I just couldn't go around 'yeah, hi, I have a crush on the guy who bullies my best friend'."

James nodded but didn't say anything. He was happy, so, so very happy. He couldn't control the smile on his face and the felt the blush still fresh and red on his cheeks.

"I was so angry at myself for liking you," Lily continued, looking at ridiculously smiling James, who kept on looking at his toes. "You were a straight up asshole."

James laughed loudly. "I still am, you know that?"

Lily smiled at him. "But, you know, even though she acts like she hates you, it doesn't always mean she _does _hate you. Just give her a bit of time to sort it out," she said, putting her hand on James shoulder and he smiled at her.

"Thanks, Lily."

"You're welcome," she said, "So... are you going to tell me who it is?" she tried. James laughed and shook his head.

"Nope, tough luck, Evans," he said, smirking at her. She smiled at him, happy that he was acting all normal again. He opened his mouth, but closed it again. Lily rose her other eyebrow, and James grinned. "About that crush of yours..." He didn't finish the sentence but Lily caught the point.

"Long passed, don't worry. I won't get in way of your love life," she said. James laughed and Lily didn't catch the faked tone of it. They sat in silence and watched the dusk.

"So, what's up with you four today? Remus was alone at common room and paired up with me in Herbs," she said, mostly to break the silence.

"Oh, it's just Pads and Moony, they have a bit of a... love worries," James explained, "They're so confused about are they friends or lovers, they don't even know which to act like. You should give them advice, Love-Doctor Evans," he smirked.

Lily punched his shoulder. "I'm not a love-doctor, I just happen to have experience, unlike some!"

"Oh, so you're saying I don't, huh?" James' smirk grew wider and Lily laughed.

"So, I take it you had something, or did you just come here to see my pretty face?" James asked after a while of pointless discussion of Sirius and Remus' friendship or relationship, which they were not so sure about.

"Oh, about the permissions to go to Hogsmeade. You should collect them from the third year boys."

James smiled and took his pack from between his legs. He went through it and pulled out a neat pile of paper slips. "I already collected them this morning," he said as he handed them to Lily. "I can to my job perfectly fine without constant reminding, you know?"

Lily was surprised. "I honestly didn't think you would have remembered."

James rose his eyebrows. "I think I should feel offended. I have fairly great memory. For example, I remember that time in second grade when I and Sirius dyed your hair green to match your eyes. I also remember being chased by History of Hogwarts for that."

Lily laughed loud and James joined her. They shared more memories of the past years to pass the time before they both noted that they should move back to the castle for the dinner.

That day, they sat together for the dinner.

* * *

Update: 29/6/2014


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **Hi! For once, I'm on time, so yay!

I don't know if I told you, but I lived tow weeks at my grandma's house because we were having a new bathroom made. But, now I'm back home and I can get seriously lost in writting this now that I have my own computer with me. (:

This chapter, as the title tells, is the fullmoon chapter. There's really noting big happening but you'll get a bit better look at the characters and their relationships, I think.

But, without further spoiling, here's the chapter five, read and enjoy and maybe, maybe leave me a review? I really enjoy reading them!

* * *

**_# CHAPTER V: Once in a full moon_**

A week after the Hogsmeade weekend, most of the Hogwarts' students thought they were witnessing the world's eighth miracle. James and Lily were more often seen talking to each other than having a half-playful half-murderous duel, and what really seemed to amaze people was that she seemed to be enjoying talking to him just as much as he enjoyed talking to her. Both of them still spent most of the time with their own friends, but if one said they were seen together at lunch, they wouldn't be suspected to gone mad between the lessons.

So, in happy but somewhat odd atmosphere came the 27th of September, the first full moon since the school started.

Remus said that he was feeling well in the morning and even though he usually skipped the lessons on the day before, today he attended to them. The others were keeping a close eye on him, knowing that he could start feeling ill in middle of the day and that his temper was a bit more fierce today.

By a bit fiercer, they meant that on the couple days before full moon their normally calm and controlled friend could become more than slightly aggressive and easily irritated. It most of the time didn't take more than too loud eating from any of them and Remus would storm out of the room in anger.

So far, on their second lesson, all had gone well. Remus hadn't yelled at anyone, and actually been able to take Sirius' horrible joke as a joke. Peter, who had always been more afraid of Remus as a human than as a wolf, still stayed couple steps behind. He had a feeling that some point of the day, Sirius or James would be able to accidentally to annoy Remus enough for him to snap and Peter didn't want to be in between during. Remus was a genius in Defence and Charms after all.

"Today," Professor Thomas said, "we'll be practising wandless magic. It's a hard aspect in magical world, and is only able to be performed by some talented or lucky, as some of you may have a natural talent on this one. How many of you had some _taste_ of your magical abilities before coming to school?" Most of the hands in the class rose, except Alice's. Alice had told that her parents had been sure she was a squib, but still had sent her to school to see if their fears were true. Yet, she had been able to produce a levitating spell in the Charms lesson. "How many of you were able to _do _things with this magic? How many of you were able to _use _it in a situations of _your_ choice?"

This time, only couple hands rose. James wasn't surprised to see Sirius' hand in air, nether Remus'. There were two Slytherins with their hands up, but what really surprised him was to see Lily's hand up. He turned to her and when he caught her eyes he mouthed her "_Really?_" She rose her right eyebrow and nodded before miming back: "_You don't have to act so surprised._"

James gave her s smirk and went back to listening to the teacher. "This is really advanced magic. You have to concentrate and try to collect all your power with your mind. I would give you an example, if this wasn't the part of the N.E.W.T's I got the lowest score." The class snickered, somehow it always seemed to be the best humour when the teacher failed. "If you, miss Evans, could give us an example? You had your hand up didn't you?" he asked, pointing at Lily. The whole class turned their heads to Lily and when she caught James' stare, she mouthed him "_Watch this_", before standing up and walking to front of the class.

First she conjured a daisy to her hand. After that, she put her wand back to her pocket and put the flower to her open palm. Slowly, she pulled her other hand above the flower and started closing her fingers one by one, forming a fist, before opening it, again one finger at time. After that, she walked to the first row, where James and Sirius were sitting next to each other.

James leaned closer to her hand, and watched as the flower closed its petals, one at time, in a same rhythm as she closed and opened her fist. Then, out of all the sudden, she closed the hand holding the daisy and crushed it into her fist. When she opened her hand again, there was no flower at all.

"What a cute trick, Evans," said one of the Slytherins, "Is that all you have in yourself?"

Lily was about to open her mouth but Sirius was quicker. "What to know what I can do without my wand?"

Suddenly there was a huge light and the Slytherin was clutching on her chair that was dancing around the class room, while the Gryffindors were roaring from laughter. Professor Thomas made a quick wand movement to stop the chair and walked over to Sirius. He slammed his hands on his table and looked at him with furious eyes. "10 points from Gryffindor," he said. "I spare you form detention this time, Black. Thank you from you presentation, Miss Evans. You can go back to your seat."

The reason behind the unusual kindness towards Sirius was left unexplained, but no one dared to say a word about it. Lily nodded a moved quickly back to her place next to Alice.

For the rest of the lesson, they kept writing down because according to Professor Thomas, they had had enough action for one lesson. The anger behind his blue eyes was all needed to keep everyone from arguing against him.

After the Defence, the lunch and Herbology went peacefully. No one was cursed, and Slytherins made sure to keep a distance between themselves and Gryffndors. They were used to it. Once in a month, Marauders started acting weird and were more aggressive. At Marauders fourth year, the same year Slytherin boys had called it _"the Marauder period", _but were soon called off by the sixth year girls from their house. By calling off, they meant that they were cursed to have a nose bleed for hours after they as much as _said_ the word period.

Even though Marauders didn't particularly _like_ the Slytherins, they had to agree that they did come up with some amazing plans when they were offended.

After Herbology, James, once again, told the others to have a wonderful lesson while he was free to do whatever he wished. Even after three weeks of school, Sirius still amazed them by his ability to take it was a personal insult that James didn't have a lesson and he did.

As James arrive the common room, he decided to take a nap, knowing that he wouldn't be able to catch much sleep later. He laid himself down on the big red couch beside the fireplace and curled himself into a ball.

"Aww, aren't we acting sweet?" Lily asked, when she came to the room fifteen minutes after James. She didn't get an answer, only a soft snore came from the boy. She smiled and sneaked closer to the couch and looked at James. He's black hair was even more tossed then usually and his mouth was open and he was very unattractively drooling. Lily laughed quietly at the sight, and looked over the nearest arm chairs to see if there were any blankets laying around.

Once she spotted one, she put it on top of James and sat down to one the arm chairs. She was determined to start the transfiguration assignment they had to turn in on Friday. She had been hoping to get James help her as he was on top of the class and she pretty much sucked, but now, as James was snoring away his time, she had no other opinions than to do the work by herself.

She was so much as able to write the title, _"Metamorphmagus",_ before she noticed that her eyes had moved back to the sleeping James. He hadn't moved or done anything else to catch Lily's attention, Lily noticed embarrassingly that she had just turned to watch him with no reason at all.

Lily collected the remaining of her concentration and was able to write the first paragraph of her essay, before she caught herself staring at James again. James had mumbled something indistinct and kicked his right feet straight, so it now hung over the edge of the sofa, so she had an excuse. But, the excuse wasn't valid now that she noticed she had been _staring_ at him for past five minutes.

She tried to collect herself to continue the work and turn her eyes of the sleeping boy, but before she was able to do that, the common room began to fill with the other seventh year Gryffindors that had gotten out of their last classes. In the lead of the group was Sirius, loudly telling the other two with him how James was a traitor for not choosing the Care of Magical Creatures, and should not be talked to for the next week.

James shifted on the couch but didn't wake up. Sirius leaned over the back of the couch and looked at his sleeping friend.

"The wanker isn't even up to hear how much of an arsehole he is!" he said, looking at Lily, who laughed.

"Sirius, calm down, please," Remus said flopping down to the arm chair next to Lily's. "Help me with this transfiguration essay." It wasn't a request but more of an order and Sirius didn't argue with him. Lily saw her moment to come.

"Hey, help me, too. You're brilliant in transfiguration," she said quickly, gaining an amusement look from Sirius.

"Sweet talking to me, aren't we, Evans?" he winked to her and got a nasty glare form Remus. Lily rolled her eyes and Sirius laughed. "Why haven't you asked Prongs? You spent a whole hour alone."

"He's been sleeping. I didn't have heart to wake him."

Remus rolled his eyes, annoyed. "You're lucky I have," he muttered before rising from his seat, and sticking his wand on James ear and charming water from his wand.

James eye's shot open and he jumped up from the couch only to trip onto his own tangled legs. Sirius laughed loudly as the confused James tried to get Remus' wand out of his ear, cursing loudly. Lily joined Sirius, and when James finally got the wand out of his ear, he looked more than mildly offended.

"You _must_, Moony?" he asked, handing Remus his wand and taking his own to dry his wet clothes. Remus gave her a slight smirk before getting back to his seat.

"Help lily with her transfiguration essay. She has waited for an hour for you to wake up."

James looked at Lily. "You should have woken me up, it's not like I wouldn't helped you," he said and Sirius sniggered.

"Yeah, right, last time I woke you up you hexed me," he said, "Why aren't Moony or Evans having none of that?" James gave him a sweet smile.

"Because you woke me up at 5am for no valid reason, Padfoot."

"I had a valid reason, don't you remember?"

"No, Sirius, the fact that train leaves in _six hours_ isn't a valid reason to wake me up."

Sirius pouted and Lily laughed. Remus seemed to find the exchange of words tiring and not so gently informed Sirius that he still needed help with is essay. Sirius, who didn't want to annoy Remus, moved quickly to sit next to him to help.

James, who was sniggering at Sirius, turned to Lily and gave her the help she needed, and eventually finished his own work, too.

When the dinner rolled over, the other's left to the Great Hall, but Remus stayed behind. Madam Pomfrey would come to take him to Shrieking Shack while the others were dining. They had made the plan to get to Remus yesterday night. As James had to go to the patrol with Lily, he was going to join the other later and make sure they didn't cross paths with Sirius and Peter while they got to the Whomping Willow.

They knew that Lily was aware of the fact that Remus was a werewolf as Remus himself said that he had told her. However, Lily didn't know about their animagus status and they honestly didn't think she would appreciate their little trips with a werewolf.

So once Lily and James started their patrol couple hours after the dinner, Sirius and Peter took the invisibility cloak and left the common room couple minutes after James and Lily.

Lily noticed that James seemed to be in bit of a rush this time. He led them quickly and talked much less than usually. Lily was sure it was nothing to be worried of, and that he was probably just worried of Remus and didn't say much of it.

James led her to the Astronomy Tower, where they found couple fifth year Ravenclaws getting in on and James gently informed them that there were places to snog closer to their house before sending them back. Lily gave him a short rant of the many levels his advice had been wrong and after they got down form the tower, James acted more like himself. He even gave Lily a detailed explanation on their last quidditch practise.

Once again, when he patrol was becoming its end, James started getting more and more anxious, and Lily eventually made a point of it.

"Okay, Potter, what's going on? I know you're worried of Remus but this is out of control."

James looked at her like she had grown a second head. "What do you mean? What's getting out of control? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"That. That's what's getting out of control. You're acting over anxious, running around like a headless chicken and blabbering like an old lady! It isn't like this is the first full moon in history. _Calm down,_ you moron!"

James shrugged his shoulders but made a point of walking slower than he did previously. He looked at Lily for approval and eventually got it, as Lily smiled at him and nodded. He sighed and turned his gaze to the hallway opening in front of them.

"You know, Evans, I wasn't walking that fast. You just have short legs."

"_Excuse me_?"

James sniggered at Lily's expression and dodged the first coming for his arm. He wiggled a finger at her. "Now, now, Miss Headgirl, it is highly uncalled for to try and _hit _people! Didn't your mother teach you any manners?"

"My mother taught me how to take down a man twice my size. Want to give that a try?" Lily asked, her eyes glimmering in the dim lighting of the corridor as she cracking her knuckles. James gave her a cheeky smirk.

"Only if you catch me, _short legs_," he said and gave her a wink. He turned on his heels and sprinted into a run. Lily took the challenge given and sprinted after him. They ran through the hallways, and eventually ended up arriving to the Fat Lady's portrait. The Lady laughed at the pair arriving, second after each other, panting and red faced.

"This... isn't what it looks like..." James spoke up the best he could between the deep breaths he had to take. Lily was in what seemed like far worse condition, almost doubled over, gripping tightly her knees.

"I'd win you in fight any other time, Potter, but right now, I need to sit down," Lily mumbled before telling Fat Lady the password and walking in. James laughed and followed her to the empty common room. Lily flopped on the arm chair next to the fireplace that was slowly going down. James decided that he wouldn't be able to leave when Lily was in the common room anyway, and sat down next to her. She sat there quietly, catching her breath.

"Maybe I should go on a jog sometimes," she mumbled and James smirked.

"We can run through our whole next patrol," he suggested. She gave him a glare.

"How about we don't." James laughed and she fought back her smile.

"Well, I should go to bed," she continued and stood up. "Good night, James."

"Good night."

He watched Lily to go up the stairs to the girls' dorms before he took the turn to the boys' stairs. He ran to the seventh year dormitory skipping every other step. The door slammed to the wall next to it as he busted trough it.

You'll never guess this one boys!" he yelled as he stepped to the room, and banged the door closed. After that he made sure not to make a single sound, making it seem like he had casted a silencing spell to the door. This was their normal way of fooling the other dorms next to theirs to think they were having a normal night in their room.

He made his way to the table on corner of the room, where Sirius had promised to leave the Map for him to use while they took the invisibility cloak.

"I solemnly swear I'm up to no good," he whispered to the map. He checked which way to the front doors was the safest in case of teachers and came to the conclusion that it didn't matter what corridor he used, as the only night watch he could see was Flitch and he was right now at close to the Slytherins common room. There was no way he would get on his way while he sneaked out.

He took a short out to the second floor and rechecked the Map in case someone besides Flich had become to see if there was students out of beds. He saw McGonagall in her office but the dot wasn't moving so it was safe to assume she wouldn't come to the corridors when he passed by.

At last, after almost getting caught by Peeves that was flying around, probably looking for Flinch to bully, he arrived the front doors and sneaked out.

The door were not locked on the nights of full moon just so Remus would get back inside once he turned back to human, but it had been charmed so it would only let humans pass through. On one of their first nights with Moony on the fields, Sirius had tried if the door would let him in as Padfoot, and been thoughtfully disappointed to find out that the door knew he was not an actual animal.

Once he got out, he sprinted to a run. As the way to the Whomping Willow was a completely flat grass field, he would eventually be straight on sight if someone decided to look through the window.

Once he got closer to the tree, he transformed to the stag. He wasn't sure if the others were still inside, or if they had already moved out. _Better safe than sorry,_ he thought.

Once he got close enough to make out the lines of the leaves on the branches, he saw Wormtail on the roots. He was waiting for him, sitting close to the trunk. Wormtail noticed him coming, in his animagis form, and moved to press the knot on the side of the tree. The branches stopped from moving and James eventually had to chance back to his human form to get trough. Wormtail moved next to him, jumping to attach himself on his leg. Once he successed in his attempt, he climbed to sit on James shoulder. James gave him a glare, but continued walking anyway.

"You lazy bum," he told the rat sitting on his shoulder.

They arrived the end of the passage, and they could hear Padfoot and Moony having a howling contest. James let Wormtail off his shoulder and took the form of the stag. The Shrieking Shack wasn't the best place for him to be in his animagus form, but he knew they would eventually move to somewhere with bit more space.

He took the direction to the room most of the sound came from and was shortly followed by Wormtail, who had to run as fast as he would to keep up with his much longer steps.

What he saw at the room was nothing abnormal. Padfoot and Moony were sitting nose to nose, barking and howling in turns to see which could do it louder. Moony was always the one to win, but it never kept the duo from competing.

When they noticed that Prongs and Wormtail had arrived, Padfoot jumped on his legs and ran to Prongs wiggling his tail.

After couple head-butts and scratches between Moony and Prongs, they were ready to go. Prongs took a running completion to the door with the werewolf, while Padfoot picked up Wormtail to carry on his back.

For the rest of the night, they ran around the fields and the Hogsmeade. The streets were empty at late at night, and having a little chance in view was welcome after the long nights Moony had spent alone and locked up.

When the sun finally began to rise, the four of them had already went back to the Shrieking Shack. They had spent the last couple hours laying in the floor, mostly sleeping, now that they had gotten out a bit of Moony's energy.

When they woke up, clock was closing 5am, and Remus was back among them.

* * *

Update: 29/6/2014


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: **Hello, time for another chapter! I really don't have much to say, I hope you enjoy!

Tell me about any mistakes I've made and hey, tell me how you like the story so far! (:

* * *

**_# CHAPTER VI: The fight_**

The weeks rolled by on their own weight. Hogsmeade weekends passed and so did the first Quidditch match, Hufflepuff vs. Slytherin, which Slytherin narrowly won.

The lessons came and went and drowned them into homework. Still, even though the last year was supposed to be harder and full of schoolwork, the Marauders found their little prank time in every day. They had started from colouring seventh year Slytherins' noses red and sent Snape a bottle of shampoo from a "secret admirer". They had chanced the colour of Mr Thomas' cloak into bright pink in middle of the lesson and made McGonagall's hat sing Christmas songs, but somehow they had been able to avoid any detentions.

In counter attack, the Slytherins had chanced Sirius' conditioner into a blond dye, but once Sirius noticed the new colour if his hair, he dressed up as his cousin Narcissa and walked around acting like her for the whole day for everyone's amusement.

It was the time of dinner, the Marauders had a new prank planed. They tried to act cool, but from years of experience with them, most of the Gryffindor table knew what to expect.

Once the Slytherins became to flow into the Hall, Peter started excitedly moving around and Sirius had to put a hand to his shoulder to still him down. They quietly watched as the Slytherins sat down and with them, watched the whole Gryffindor table. They knew something was about to happen.

Slytherins quickly noticed the stares to the Gryffindors and they already knew what it meant. They tried to go through all of the foods and drinks to find something abnormal on them. Once they failed, the Marauders let out the breath they had been holding and watched as the suspicious Slytherins poured Pumpkin Juice to their goblets, still trying to see any kind of hits in the eyes to the Gryffindors.

Once they came to the conclusion that the Pumpkin Juice was safe, they let out a breath and started drinking.

Three seconds passed and the whole Great Hall was quiet. Marauders leaned over the table and kept their eyes focused only on Slytherins. Then, one of the younger students opened their mouth.

"I really like the new Defence teacher, you know. He has the scar and all, it just gives him a very sex-" she slammed her hands on her mouth but it all just kept coming out. Soon the whole Slytherin table was babbling nonsense. The Marauders smirked and high fived each other.

The Gryffindor table laughed, most of them at least, and some came to shake their hands on their successful prank. It wasn't all that uncommon for them to do something along the lines, but people still always seemed impressed.

"Thank you, thank you!" Sirius said loudly. "Do any Slytherins have anything to say?" He laughed at the angry yells he got from the Slytherin table.

"_What did you do to them?!" _Lily asked, walking to them with an expression angrier than anyone else, including the Slytherins.

"Why, Evans, just a bit of fun," Peter answered, smiling to Lily the sweetest smile possible.

"Were you in this Remus?" she asked, pointing his piercing gaze on the quietest member of the four.

"Are you kidding? Do you think anyone else could have brewed that Babbling Beverage?" Sirius asked her. "Seriously, Evans, we're strikingly intelligent, but we're not potioneers."

Lily crossed her arms over her chest and rolled her eyes. "Whatever, I'll take five house points from every one of you and give you detention," she said and turned her back to them and walked away.

"_'I'll take five house points from every one of you and give you detention'_, _god_, can she even give you detention Prongs?" Sirius asked, turning to James, who just shrugged his shoulders.

"I don't know, but McGonagall doesn't seem happy and she sure can give me one," he said, pointing to the angry witch walking quickly towards them.

"Potter! You are the Headboy! You should be an example to younger students, not act like this," she said once she reached them.

"I'm a cautionary example?" he tried, and by the vein in her forehead he noticed that it had been the worst possible thing to say.

"Detention, to all of you," she said.

"Professor, we already got one from Evans," Remus said, seeming regretful about the prank. The others knew it was probably all an act that would save them from losing more house points.

"Eight o'clock in my office, tomorrow, am I clear?"

"Yes, ma'am."

At the night, when James and Lily had their patrolling, he got a proper lecture about how idiotic their little joke had been. Lily wasn't going to let him easy on this.

"I thought you had matured over the summer! Do you know what could have happened if that potion hadn't been brewed correctly? Their vocal chords could have been ripped off, James, they wouldn't have been able to speak, _at all_!"

"Relax, Lily, of course we knew about that! Do you think we didn't test that potion before we mixed it into the pumpkin juice?" he said, sounding bored and tired.

"You tested it? On yourselves?" James nodded. "_Oh my GOD, _James!" Lily stopped on her tracks. "You tested that potion on yourselves and you _knew_ what it could have done if something had gone wrong?"

"Yeah, Lily, we did. It's not a big deal, we always do it and-"

"You _always_ do it? Heaven's sake, what about that time you disguised those Dungbombs looking like muffins and got Mulciber eating them? You tried those on yourself, too?" James nodded. Lily looked at him, dumbfounded. "You-... How...-"

James put his finger on her lips in sign for her to keep quiet. He listened for a moment before telling her to follow him. Even though she was still angry about everything, she followed him without a word.

The arrived the Defence Against the Dark Arts corridor. James walked quietly toward the statue of the one eyes witch and once they were close enough, they saw Severus Snape and Narcissa Black there.

"Stealing your best friends girl, are we, Snivelly?" he asked, leaning on the statue. Snape gave him a glare and reached for his wand. James was quicker and pulled out his own. "I wouldn't try that, Snape."

Snape looked at him angrily. Watching from a bit of an affair, Lily saw how small Severus looked next to James, who was busting confidence and stood straight backed.

"What are you two doing so far from your common room at this time of night? I bet there's lot places to snog closer," he said, playing with his wand, not pointing Snape with it.

"We weren't snogging, _Potter,_" Snape spit out the name like it was the worst insult in the world.

"Oh, you were not? She looks still fairly disgusted. Oh, I forgot, it's just her face," he gave them a smirk. "So if you were not making out here, then what were you doing?"

"That's none of your business."

"Look, Snivelly, I know where you get from this passage, and," he said. Snape's face fell but he kept looking at James with the same defiant look in his eyes. "If I ever catch you or your friends near this statue again, I sadly have to inform the Headmaster about it. Am I clear to you?"

Narcissa opened her mouth first time in the whole time. "You and your _girlfriend_ can do whatever you want! Dumbledore is a fool, and so are you and that mudblood!"

"Wash your mouth!" James yelled, and Narcissa's mouth started to full with soap foam. James' wand wasn't pointing at her, but his gaze was intensely locked with her.

"James, stop!" Lily said and pulled out her wand. She cast the counter spell and Narcissa's mouth stopped foaming.

"Go," Lily said, not in the friendliest tone of voice. "You get off without anything this time, but next time we won't let you go this easily."

The two Slytherins turned and went away, time to time looking behind them. James remained where he was. Lily looked at him furiously.

"What do you think you're doing?" she yelled.

"She called you a... a-" James yelled back, turning to face Lily with a furious stare, challenging her to fight him on this one. "She called you _that word_!"

"Yes, thank you very much, James, it does not give you the right _fill her mouth with soap foam_!" Lily screamed to his face. James opened his arms wide and rolled his eyes.

"Well, that wasn't my intention! Accidental magic, has Miss Perfect ever heard of that?"

"You're seventeen, Potter! You should be able to control yourself more than that!"

"Oh, I fucking apologize for having zero self-control and standing up for you, won't happen again," James said, turning to get on going. Lily grabbed his shoulder and forced him to turn to her.

"Stop acting, like an immature arsehole, Potter, and-" Lily started, but James shook the hand of from his shoulder and interrupted Lily.

"Yes, Lily, that's what I am. I am an immature arsehole, and I won't chance. I'm a rebel and I'm fucking childish. I know, and I won't chance. I won't chance for McGonagall, I won't chance for Dumbledore, I won't chance for Sirius, and I won't chance for you." he yelled, looking Lily straight into eyes. "No matter how much I love you, I won't chance for you."

Lily stood there with her mouth open, looking at James in awe. She hadn't never heard him yell at anyone like that before. James gave her one last glace before he turned around and walked off. Lily collected herself and run after him.

"You love me?"

"Oh, _please_, like you didn't know."

"No, I did not, and don't you talk to me like that!"

"And then what, Lily? What difference it would make? You don't like me, I'm an arsehole with no care of the others or the world around me. I'm arrogant and selfish, and everything you could possibly hate in man. You want someone stable like Remus, or that Ravenclaw, someone who will talk you about philosophy and bring you red roses. I'm not that guy, Lily," he said, walking so fast with his long legs that Lily, as a short girl, had trouble to keep up with him.

"Potter, listen, I-"

"No, I won't. Go play with someone else, I'm trough with this."

Lily stopped walking, and watched as James disappeared behind the corner. He didn't look behind a single time for the whole way to the Gryffindor tower.

* * *

Updated: 29/6/2014


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:** Hello again! This is chapter 7, and we finally get something actually happening in this story!

On cool news, I got a new computer yesterday and it had a proper writing programme that does proper spell check and has UK English. I checked the other chapters with it, too, and I'll be re-updating them with new better checked versions maybe today, or at least next week when I have time.

_**WARNING! **__This chapter contains a some short of panic/anxiety attack on one of the characters and I'm not expert on these things, but I think it should be warned before hand so no one will get uncomfortable. It's pretty vaguely described, but better face than sorry, no?_

So, here it is, enjoy and leave a review of your thoughts on the story! And still, any mistakes you notice, please inform me about them! (:

* * *

**_CHAPTER VII: The painful silence_**

The next day was painful for everyone in Gryffindor. The Headpair refused to talk to each other, and when they thought the other one wasn't looking, they gave their back the most murderous stare they could manage.

Sirius, the saviour of the house, tried his best to come up with reasons to get James out of the common room when Lily was there, but his constant attempts were a failure.

"C'mon James, let's go to... to fly," he said, trying his very best to cheer James up. "Let's have a snitch competition, like in summer."

James sighed. He knew Sirius couldn't stand any of them being sad, but he couldn't really help it. Still, he felt like he owned this to Sirius.

"Okay, let's go then."

Sirius face lit up. "Really? Okay, I get the brooms, you find the snitch, okay?" He jumped out of the couch they've been sitting, and sprinted towards the stair to the boys dorms.

James got up slower, lingering a last glare to Lily's direction. He made his way to the portrait hole and it wasn't long after Sirius caught him.

"We _could _fly out of the castle," he said. James was very familiar with the smirk Sirius had on his lips. No matter his foul mood, he found his own mouth cracking into a very similar grin.

"Now, now, Padfoot, what would professor McGonagall say about such a thought?"

"Oh, but Prongs-dearie, what McGonagall does not know, does not make her say anything."

James's smirk grew wider on unison with Sirius'. He gripped his broom from Sirius' hand.

"The last one on the doors does the other's homework for the next week."

And with that, he was on the broom. He heard Sirius yell behind him, but he kept his eyes in the hallway in front of him. He knew there was a secret passage to the first floor just couple corridors away and tried to remember whether it was the one that was high but not so wide or the other way around. He was pretty sure it was high enough for him to fly within, but he could be wrong.

He couldn't hear Sirius behind him, but was sure he would be on his way to the doors. He made the decision to go with the secret passage and made a quick turn to the right, through the door that seemed like a thick bring wall.

The passage, for James' luck, was the one that was high but not very wide. He flew on the top speed of his broom, and could feel the walls scratch his feet time to time when he followed the tight curves of the passage.

He knew he had a great advance on Sirius, he had probably chosen to go with the corridor on the fifth floor. But, for Sirius' honour, he had to remind himself that to cheer him up, Sirius would probably lose without a bigger fight.

He knew Sirius would do anything to make him or the other two happy again. He would sacrifice his pride and anything he just had to offer for them to be safe and sound. James and Frank often talked that Sirius would had made a great Hufflepuff. Every time Sirius heard them, he would laugh and tell that it would have been probably only way for him to disappoint his parents even further, to have been sorted on Hufflepuff.

The end of the passage got closer and the curves of the corridor got tighter. James was lucky to have run through that corridor enough times to have a fairly great idea of the turns because if he did not, he would have crashed against the wall many times during is flight.

He busted trough the wall to the first floor and was lucky to see no one. He felt cold sweat run on his back when he passed the door to McGonagall's office. Sometimes it felt like that woman had a sixth since. She could practically _feel_ when they were doing something wrong and was always there to tell them off and give them detention.

James knew he was great deal before Sirius. Sirius wouldn't have been able to get between him and the front door no matter what passage he had used.

He could already see the door in front of him but he still felt the uncomfortable feeling that this was not going to end without them getting at least house point taken from them. The teacher's room's door was still for him to pass after the big stairs to the entrance hall. As it was Saturday, most of the teachers would be spending time in their own room but there was a chance someone stopped there to get something or that they were there just to pass the rumours about their least favourite students.

James could now hear the sound of Sirius' flying behind him but he was almost sure about his victory. Still, he quickened his peace and leaned forward to his broom to gain even more speed.

The last meters to the door were the only parts of the competition that James actually felt that maybe his victory wasn't so sure at all. Sirius was a great flyer, and as James best friend he knew that sometimes it wasn't the victory that would cheer him up, but getting his arse whipped, thoughtfully.

So, when he landed in front of the huge wooden doors, winning the competition, he couldn't help but give Sirius a huge smile.

"Have fun with my homework, honey," he told him as Sirius landed next to him. The glare Sirius gave was fairly a shadow of his usual death stare.

"You little bitch," he answered to James, and playfully hit his shoulder. "You cheated, there's no other way."

James laughed at Sirius and they turned to open the doors and walk for the rest of the way, but they didn't make it far when they heard a yell behind them.

"Potter! Black!"

In unison they turned their eyes to each other, to read the same exited panic from the other's eyes, before they turned to face the head of their house behind them.

"G'day, professor, how may I be on your service on this particular Saturday afternoon?" Sirius said and gave McGonagall a deep bow. McGonagall merely acknowledged him before turning to James.

"I need you, both of you, to come inside with me. Now."

Without further word she turned and walked back to the castle. James and Sirius gave each other a questioning looks before following her with a shrug of shoulders.

McGonagall lead them back to her office to the first floor. For the whole trip there she didn't say anything, just lead them quietly. The two following her became more and more concerned every quiet step they took.

"Sit down," ordered McGonagall when they arrived to the office. She walked to the other side of the table and sat down herself. James and Sirius quietly sat down, keeping their suspicious eyes on McGonagall.

"What going on?" James asked. McGonagall acted like she didn't even hear the question.

"I expect that both of you have heard of the man who calls himself 'Lord Voldemort'?" The boys nodded, not quite sure what was happening. McGonagall sighed and closed her eyes before continuing.

"Lord Voldemort has been collecting followers around the Britain for a while now and even thought we knew that he was getting stronger and stronger, we had no idea how many people had already given in to his power."

James and Sirius continued staring McGonagall in confusion. They had no idea how all this had to do anything with them. Voldemort had been around for a while now. They knew that the Slytherin house was delighted and that most of the Gryffindor house was furious about the things he did.

Until this moment, they had both considered this "Dark Lord" and his gloomy little followers that called themselves "Death Eaters" as a small gang moving somewhere in Britain and scaring old ladies. But after what McGonagall said, they felt like there was so much more to this story.

"I know one usually invites the closest relatives to hear something like this, but I happen to know that Mr Black lives with you Potter's for now and... I think it would be good for you two to hear it from me before the Daily Prophet."

McGonagall stopped for a moment and gave them a look that could only represent great pity and sadness.

"Yesterday, there Lord Voldemort attacked on Ministry. Mr and Mrs Potter were there." She looked James' straight into eyes. "They're now at the St. Mungo's. Neither has woken up. I'm sorry."

James didn't move for a long time. He stared into McGonagall's eyes with a panicked look. His mouth opened time after time but he couldn't make a sound. His breath started to quicken and his hands shook violently.

Sirius, who was only slightly in better condition, grabbed his friend hands to keep them from shaking.

"It's okay, James, it's okay. They'll be fine, you hear me?" he said, looking at James, who slowly turned his head to look Sirius.

They looked into each other eyes for a long time. Sirius kept repeating the words "It's okay." and "They'll be fine." over and over again but nothing in James' expression signalled that he understood what he was told.

Soon the shaking of his hands took over his whole body in violent spams. McGonagall called Madame Pomfrey to her office and James was moved to the Hospital Wing to calm down.

During the whole time, he didn't say a word or let out a sound. He kept staring to the distance the whole time, like he wasn't even aware of what his body was doing or what was happening in front of him.

Sirius, who couldn't keep tears away from his cheeks, looked at his best friend and understood what he was once told by Remus.

"Nothing screams agony like silence."

James was not the only one to have bad news that day. The hospital wing was fuller than in a long time, when hysteric and agonized teenagers were brought in. Somewhere screaming and crying, some were sitting there, quietly like James, just staring in front of them and trying to tell themselves this was all just a bad dream.

Sirius left the hospital wing quite early, assuring Madame Pomfrey he was all good now. He felt like he was invading someone's personal space by sitting there, watching the other mourn from their loss or fear of what was left. They weren't his parents that were laying unconscious in the bed section of Saint Mungo's. No matter how much like the loving mother he had never had Mrs Potter was, she wasn't his mother. He wasn't allowed to take the attention from those who had actually lost something today. It wasn't this place to be.

He made his way to the common room. The Gryffindor's common room was full, it was like the whole house had gathered there to talk about the attack and what the Ministry was going to do next. When Sirius stepped in, the whole room went quiet for a while. As soon as they noticed it was just him, they turned back to their mates and continued where they left off. Soon the room was filled with the mumbling of how awful it was for those, whose parents worked for the Ministry.

Sirius didn't pay attention to the couple glares he got. He knew they were thinking about his family and the prejudices they held for muggles and muggleborns. He what they were thinking. His last name screamed "a supporter of Voldemort".

He found Remus and Peter sitting by the fireplace with Lily and Mary. He had seen Marlene at the hospital wing and knew that her parents had been in by the time of the attack. Mary had tears in her eyes and Lily was just looking at the fire with blank stare.

Remus was the first to notice him. He stood up and took couple steps towards him and made an attempt to hug him before coming to other thoughts and backing off.

"How's James?" Peter asked, tapping the empty place next to him, telling Sirius to sit down.

"He's not good. He hasn't let out a sound after he heard." told Sirius, sitting next to Peter and leaning back against the back rest. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He felt tired and wasn't sure if he wanted to talk about anything right now.

"Did you see Marlene, how was she?" Mary asked with a quiet, raspy voice. Sirius could hear she wasn't far from crying.

"She was screaming."

Mary shrunk to her seat and Sirius was from her shoulders that she was now crying. "It'll be fine, Mary. She'll be fine. We'll all be fine," he said.

Mary nodded her head and pulled her knees to her chest. Lily, who was sitting next to her, took her eyes away from the fire and pulled her friend into a hug. They all could see that she was now crying too but no one said a word.

"I think I'll go to sleep for a while," Sirius said and rose from his seat. He walked off to the dorms. He could hear Remus excuse himself after him and follow him to the dorms.

"Sirius," Remus started when they arrived to the dorms. Sirius made his way straight to his bed and flopped down on his stomach, closing his eyes and burring his head to his pillow. "How are you?"

No answer.

"I know it's hard for you, too." Still no answer.

Remus sighed and walked up to Sirius. He sat next to him to the edge of his bed and reached to touch his back. "Sirius..."

Sirius turned his head to the side and opened one eye to look Remus. "They were not my parents," he simply stated. Remus gave him a slight smile.

"They were more than your mother ever was."

Sirius kept his steady stare on Remus. "I can't just go around and cry. There are people who have really lost a relative today. I'm not one of them."

"Sirius, it doesn't matter if they weren't your relatives. Blood isn't the thing that defines who is important and who is not. Right?" Remus said, quoting something Sirius had told him when the three of them had found about his little furry problem.

Sirius looked at Remus. His eyes were starting to water and he felt his lower lip tremble. He turned to his side and opened his arms toward Remus. Remus pulled him to a hug and held him while he let out the tears he had been holding since the moment he arrived to the Hospital Wing.

Back in common room, Peter was sitting alone with the two crying girls. He knew that Remus was trying to get Sirius to feel better back in the dorms and that he was not invited there. Not that he wanted to go. He might be many things, but he was extremely bad with crying people.

Lily had crying Mary in her arms and even thought the tears were leaking out of her own eyes, she did her best to keep her voice steady when she repeatedly whispered "It's okay, she'll be fine," to her friend and caressed her hair.

She wasn't really paying attention to what she was doing. She was working like a machine. In her mind she was trying to figure out what all this meant. Was her family in danger? How strong Voldemort really was? Was all of this just a taste of his power?

She had heard of the ideology of what Voldemort was known for. She knew that in his eyes, she was a problem. And she knew that he wasn't the only one to think like that. There were many, many people, even some in her school mates that were ready to throw her and anyone like her into the hand of Voldemort, or anyone that just was willing to take care of them.

She was a _mudblood_, after all.

By the night, the common room slowly emptied. No one said anything more than _good night_ to the others anymore. The feeling had been low for the whole day, and no news had arrived from their friends in Hospital Wing since the morning.

On the next morning, Sunday morning, most of the people moved to the hospital wing came back to their dorms. No one dared to say anything about the attack, but it hung above everything for the rest of the day.

Some, mostly the ones whose relatives had died in Ministry, were still in the Hospital Wing, but they now allowed visitors. Lily, Mary and Alice went to visit Marlene. She was sitting on one of the beds, curled in a ball, her head pressed against her knees. They tried to talk to her, but she didn't have much to say. When Madame Pomfrey told them that the visiting hour was over, they rose and told Marlene they would visit her again as soon as they could.

James had left the Hospital Wing as soon as Madame had let him. He had visited his unconscious parents in Saint Mungo's, but it hadn't really made him feel any better about anything. Seeing his mother and father laying in the beds with pale faces and injured bodies didn't bring up his hopes for their quick recovery.

James had locked himself into the dorms without saying a word to any of his friends. Remus had told Sirius just to wait and let him think about everything for a while.

"He just in shock right now, he needs a bit of time. He'll speak when he feels like it," he had said, Peter nodding next to him. Sirius had given them a disagreeing look, but kept quiet about it for the rest of the day.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** Hi, again time for new chapter! I actually wrote this today, which is something that should not have happened, but yeah, I was still able to update in time.

This leads us to this little _**announcement: **__I might not be able to update this fic every week from now on. I've fallen behind on the planned writing schedule, and I don't know if I can actually keep up writing chapters in the speed I did with this one, and to be honest, I think that if I do so, it will effect the story in a way that isn't quite so good. So from now on, I will try my best to keep up updating every Sunday but i can't promise anything so if I fall behind, I will update as soon as I finish writing. _

So, that it, I hope you enjoy and umm, yeah, tell me how you like it so far!

* * *

Monday started out as gloomy and silent as you'd expect. Not only were many students still in Hospital Wing for being unable to attend the classes after the shock, the ones that had been free to go to their houses during the weekend were now looked upon with pitying eyes and smothered with I'm-sorry's and if-there's-any-way-I-could-help's.

While, to some, that was help, to some it was a horrifying experience. Pity wasn't something everyone was able to deal with, and for that reason, James had run away from his house before anyone else woke up. He ate the breakfast in the Great Hall that was mostly empty, excluding some other with the same idea as James. They all kept quiet and locked their eyes on their uneaten meals. James poked his marmalade toast with a knife and thought about the attack and his parents.

He had visited them in the St. Mungo's on Saturday, and eventually spent most of the Sunday there. Their pale faces hadn't brought him any kind of relief or belief that they were going to stay around much longer. While the healers said that his mother was showing signs of regaining conscious, they didn't dare to say a word about his father unless asked. After a while of questioning, he had gathered that his father was barely hanging. The healers were able to keep him alive, but there was only slight chance for him to wake up.

"He's old. His body cannot take this kind of injuries quite like when he was younger," had said one of the healers. James hadn't much more than nodded before excusing himself and leaving the hospital.

Now, sitting alone in the Gryffindor table, he thought about his mother. He had spent so much time worrying about his father that he hadn't bothered thinking of her. She wasn't going to die, or so had the healers said. Her physical health was good, she was younger than his father and her wounds and injuries hadn't been as bad as his to start with. The healers told that she was most likely still unconscious because of the physical trauma.

The hall started to fill with the other students. James looked at his uneaten meal and took the toast on his hands before rising from his seat and walking to the doors.

"Prongs!" he heard Sirius yell. He stopped and looked at his friend who ran down the stairs to him. "Where are you going?"

James shrugged his shoulders. "I don't want to see them all looking at me like some wounded puppy," he said. Sirius nodded and pulled his friend closer to the hallway almost under the stairs where Hufflepuffs were stumbling out for the breakfast.

"Let's go eat in the kitchens."

James nodded wordlessly and they pushed themselves through the stream of Hufflepuffs. Some of the Hufflypuffs yelled after them, asking where were they going, but neither of the boys felt the need to answer.

"James! Sirius!" voice called. They both turned to face Frank running towards them. "What are you doing here?" he asked when he caught them up.

"We're going to the kitchens," Sirius said. Frank nodded and turned his eyes to James.

"Look, I heard about your parents form Alice, and I'm sorry," he said. "If there anything I can do just-"

James cut him off. "Thanks, but, you know, they're still both live and just, let it be." With nothing else James turned to continue his way to the kitchens, leaving confused Frank and Sirius behind. Sirius shrugged his shoulders to Frank and said "Sorry," before quickly following James.

Neither didn't say anything about James' parents for the time they ate in the kitchens. Sirius tried to keep the conversation going by talking about other things, but not even talking about the next prank or Quidditch seemed to interest James. He poked his food with no interest to eat it and no matter what Sirius tried, he didn't do any help.

Sirius knew that James wasn't one of those who wanted apologizes or sad and pitying looks. James didn't want people to think he wasn't able to deal with his own pain, he didn't want the other to know how weak he felt right now. After years of experience of this stupidly Gryffindor behaviour Sirius was also aware that no matter how hard James tried to hide his feelings about his family, he would break at some point. Maybe not today or even this week, but at some point he would break. And Sirius did not want to see that happen.

"James, you should talk about it."

James rised his eyes from his meal to Sirius. "I don't want to talk about it."

Sirius sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "Okay, then. But if you want to, anytime, I'll listen," he said. "You know that right?"

James gave him a faint smile and reached over the table to place his hand on Sirius shoulder. "I know. I'm sorry."

"If you two are done having a moment, we have a lesson to attend," said Remus from leaning the kitchen door. He had a slight smile on his lips and they could hear Peter sniggering behind him. Sirius rolled his eyes and rose from his seat.

"Remus, dear, this is why I never get laid with him." James snorted loudly behind him.

"I'm sorry, mate, it's not Remus that keeps you from getting laid," he told and patted Sirius back when he walked past him.

"Is it because I'm _fat_?" Sirius said, mocking hurt and ran after James.

Remus and Peter broke into loud laughter while James gave Sirius a smirk. "No, it's because I'm straight, mate."

Sirius wiggled his eyebrows. "That's what I said, 'till fifth year."

"And I until sixth," Remus added.

James rolled his eyes. "If you want to come out, Peter, I think this is the time."

"I haven't yet found the closet to go, yet," Peter answered and looked over his shoulder as he was walking a bit before the others.

The first lesson of the day was Defence Against Dark Arts. Gryffindors had that class with Slytherins and it had been more than a slight concern of the teachers that morning. The two houses had never been in good relationship, but it was predictable that the attack just made the gap between the houses just wider.

In the class, the atmosphere was tense. The Gryffindors kept glaring at the Slytherins, and without any problem ignored those couple puffy and red eyed of them who had obviously lost someone in the attack. Slytherins were wise enough to mostly keep their eyes on the tables in front of them and their mouth shut.

For the whole lesson James kept his eyes on the professor and unlike the others, didn't even glance towards the Sytherins.

The subject of the lesson was defensive spells. Professor Thomas taught them couple basic defensive spells before he ordered them into pairs. James was paired with Lily, and the other Marauders felt the panic slip into them.

"Did you remember the Lily thing?" Sirius asked Remus, who shook his head.

"No, I didn't."

"Neither did I."

"Do you think we should do something?"

"I think we should definitely do something."

Meanwhile, Lily was getting up to her pair. James hadn't moved an inch since the pairs were announced and even thought it annoyed Lily a little, she was trying to be understanding because of the situation James was in. She remembered visiting Marlene in the hospital wing on Sunday and even though James' parents were still both alive, it didn't mean he was probably much better.

"James," she called when she arrived to James' desk. James rose up and looked at Lily and nodded. They started with one of the spells they had been taught some point on fourth year, but Professor Thomas felt was needed to rehearse. They threw some easy jinxes on each other and the other used the defensive spell to protect themselves.

"I'm sorry I didn't come patrolling yesterday," James said when about half of the lesson had passed.

"It's okay, I understand," Lily said, giving James a faint smile. "You have it hard right now."

James flinched at the pity in Lily's voice, but nodded and continued with the spells. Lily didn't notice James' reaction and continued talking, forgetting about their fight couple days earlier.

"I mean, I don't even know what I would do if it was my parents. I wouldn't probably be able to get out of bed in the morning, let alone attend lessons."

Lily kept talking and James felt the frustaration to rise inside him. The felt his hands shaking and tongue drying. He saw Lily's mouth moving but couldn't make what she was saying anymore. His wand dropped on to the floor from his hands and his knees gave in.

"James? James? Are you alright?" Lily asked, kneeling before him. On that moment, the wall behind them exploded. There were screams in the class and the bricks flying around. James was sitting in on the floor, panting and coughing on the dust.

"Mr. Potter," Professor Thomas called, making his way to James. "Mr. Potter, are you able to walk?"

James nodded. "Good, I'm taking you to the Hospital Wing. Class dismissed."

Professor Thomas took James form his arm and started to lead him to the classroom door. The rest of the class was left behind, watching quietly as James was walked off.


End file.
